chilli chickpea and sausage casserole

Chilli, chickpea and veggie sausage casserole

Originally adapted from Stylist in 2012
Serves 4-6


Olive oil
1 large onion or leek, finely sliced
3 garlic cloves, crushed (you can use as much garlic as you like, great for warding off colds!)
1 small chilli, finely chopped, or 3/4 teaspoon dried chilli flakes
2 boxes/packets of vegetarian/vegan sausages (12 in total) [I use Linda McCartney, they are the best veggie sausages ever]
2 teaspoons sweet smoked paprika
1 x 425g cans organic chickpeas
1 x 25g tin tomato puree
1 x 370g pouch chopped tomatoes
100ml wine (red or white)
250ml vegetable stock, plus more if needed
1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
Salt and pepper
Fresh parsley, a handful, roughly chopped
Spinach, as much as you want, roughly chopped


Preheat the oven to 180 C/Gas Mark 4/375 F.

Meanwhile heat the olive oil in a large casserole pan (treat yourself to a Le Creuset if you haven't already) over medium high heat.  Add the onion, chilli and garlic, cook until softened and golden, then add the sausages.  They don't need to be browned like meat sausages, but just coated in all the oniony chilli oily goodness.  Cook for about a minute then add the drained chickpeas, paprika, tomato puree, wine, stock, vinegar and seasoning.  Mix well.

Cover and place in the oven for about 45 minutes.  Check and add more stock if it gets dry.

Stir in the parsley and spinach just before serving so the spinach wilts.

life lessons

Today I found a poem (well, I called it a poem - collection of thoughts might be more accurate!) I wrote when I was 27. I’m now 40, and I think the advice it contains has stood the test of time.

Me in Hyde Park, age 27. Photo taken by Tom, my then boyfriend, now husband of 11 years.

Me in Hyde Park, age 27. Photo taken by Tom, my then boyfriend, now husband of 11 years.


If it sounds too good to be true
it probably is.
Pick your friends wisely.
Never take happiness for granted.
Try to finish what you start.
Don't sneeze too loudly
in public.
Wear lipstick on Sundays.
Remember you don't have to fake it
when you're with the right person.
There is nothing that can stop you,
short of death.
Recycle.
Smell strawberries,
roses and clean hair
with equal delight.
Drink water.
Have more books than clothes.
Always offer.
Buy a good coat.
Say please.
Don't rent a flat when you can see
rat bait in the kitchen.
A good bolognaise needs red wine.
As does cheese.
Take a day off. Don't be afraid to ask
for what you want.
But don't do it just because you can.
Write only, and flamboyantly,
with a fountain pen.
Wear sunscreen.
Say thank you.
Smile at people on public transport.
You'll either brighten their day,
or confuse them.
Find some stars for your sky.

40 things i've learned about life, now i'm 40

A blonde woman in a pink dress holding two silver balloons in the shape of a 4 and a 0. She's smiling.
  1. If you don’t own it - your life, your past, your story - it will own you.

  2. The messiest times in life are often, looking back, the most interesting and nearly always a source of growth. Hold your nerve, stay the course. Trust it will all work out.

  3. A life filled with magic, adventure and fun does not just happen. You have to make the choice to cultivate those things in your life, every single day.

  4. Playing small doesn’t serve you, only the people around you who want you to stay that way.

  5. “See what happens” is not a cop-out, it’s a way of taking the pressure off. Letting things evolve naturally is a lesson in grace and patience.

  6. You can't change anyone. People only change because they want to and there’s got to be something in it for them to do it.

  7. We all have a choice in how we want to live - the trick is to make conscious choices rather than unconscious ones.

  8. Tables always turn.

  9. It is possible to be strong and fragile at the same time. Both are courageous.

  10. Change is what it is. It’s all about how you negotiate it.

  11. Anyone who believes gossip and lies about you before hearing your side of the story was already looking for a reason to be against you. Let them go.

  12. Protect your mental health and inner peace by any means necessary. You never have to apologise for protecting yourself.

  13. Old ways will rarely open new doors.

  14. Perspective is everything (thank you Sandi Sieger).

  15. Your passions are not accidents. They are the clues to where you will find meaning in life. Embrace them. Follow them.

  16. Three things always come out - the sun, the moon, and the truth.

  17. You have to go out on a limb in life, because that’s where the fruit is. Corny but true!

  18. There are many universal needs that human beings have - one of them is to feel appreciated. Showing gratitude, for others and for life, as often as you can is an instant mood lifter.

  19. Love will never feel like love unless you also love yourself.

  20. Comparison is the quickest route to despair.

  21. No is a complete sentence. And you can say it - just do it politely and fast.

  22. Most people deserve a second chance. But no one deserves a third (see point 12).

  23. Likes and follows are empty calories that never satisfy. Find what really feeds you instead.

  24. There is no shinier, more successful, more likeable, more accomplished, more together you waiting in the future. You are only you, now. You are only ever here. Accepting that will make life so much easier, and sweeter.

  25. Confidence doesn’t come from achievements, it comes when you decide to have it. Confidence is a choice.

  26. So is self-pity.

  27. You are the only one who can give yourself what you’re seeking from others.

  28. When change comes, it’s likely that opportunity will also knock at the door. Keep an ear out.

  29. Nothing is forever - pain or joy.

  30. Boundaries will protect you, and allow you to love and give more freely. Without them, you will be constantly resentful and disappointed.

  31. It’s amazing what can happen when you drop all your expectations and attachment to an outcome.

  32. Continuing to choose joy in the face of adversity is an act of courage and resistance (thank you Holly Ringland).

  33. Meanings of words change all the time. “Success” is probably the most mercurial. You do not have to hold yourself hostage to past definitions if they no longer serve you.

  34. You can endure a lot more than you think you can.

  35. If it makes you happy, it doesn’t have to make sense to anyone else.

  36. Slow progress is still progress.

  37. It is possible to one day laugh in places where you used to cry. Know that you can always change the story.

  38. Failure and defeat are better judges of character than success.

  39. Fighting ageing is a battle no one has ever won, and getting older is a privilege denied to so many. Look forwards, not backwards.

  40. When in doubt, be bold, generous, loving and unafraid.

creamy curried parsnip soup with black rice

IMG_AC48E8499448-1.jpeg

This soup has a lot of happy memories.

I used to make it a lot when Tom and I were newlyweds, in our tiny basement flat in Pimlico, when the air was freezing, autumn leaves were raked up in proud piles in the streets, it got dark at 3:30pm and parsnips were plentiful.  A £1 bag of them would make a vat of this soup and on dark late autumn and winter nights, we would cosy up on our dilapidated old couch and watch movies, pressing pause so we could return to the kitchen for another ladle. I discovered this soup thanks to Shaheen’s Allotment2Kitchen blog all those years ago but I, in true Phil style, made it my own by adding coconut cream and garam masala. Since moving back to Australia, I’ve adapted it further.

We used to make the soup with wild rice, which I never had a problem finding in supermarkets in the UK, but it doesn’t seem to be a thing here. However, black rice is available and it makes a lovely contrast with the fluoro yellow of the soup. You can just use brown rice if that’s all you can find, but black rice does seem to be widely available in Oz and I think it adds interest, contrast and extra health benefits, as well as being super filling!

Parsnips are a sweet root vegetable so the earthy notes of curry powder and turmeric are a perfect partner. You’ll note I’ve refrained from adding heat here – most unusual – but the natural sweetness of the parsnips combined with the spices and rice are so well balanced I feel that adding another flavour component would throw the whole thing off. But I am, as always, willing to be proven wrong.

Until the other night, I hadn’t made this soup for a very, very long time. I don’t see parsnips available in the shops here very often – another reason I’d like to grow them myself when we eventually have a home with space for a bigger vegetable patch – so it hadn’t been on my radar for a while. But then I saw some proud specimens in the grocers after work one night, and not at an exorbitant price (I do miss being able to buy a kilo of them for £1!), so I grabbed them, with the sudden thought that it might be nice to wander down memory lane and try this soup again.

Such a lot has happened these past ten-and-a-half years, but one spoonful of this warming, comforting soup last night and we were right back there in that little flat, with everything that hadn’t happened yet still to come.

creamy curried parsnip soup with black rice

1 ½ cups black rice (or wild rice, if you can find it. Brown will also do)

Olive oil
2 medium or 1 large brown onion, chopped
1 large garlic clove, crushed or finely chopped
4 large parsnips (approximately 1 kilogram), peeled and chopped
1 teaspoon turmeric
1 teaspoon garam masala
2 tablespoons curry powder (I use medium)
1 x 400ml can coconut cream
3 teaspoons vegetable or “chicken style” stock powder (I use Massel chicken style)
Enough boiling water to cover

 Place the black rice in a saucepan, add 2 cups water, cover and place on a high heat until it comes to the boil. Reduce to a simmer for approximately 30 minutes until the water is absorbed and the rice is tender. Turn off heat, place a tea towel over the top and replace the lid (I always do this with rice, it absorbs any extra moisture and makes it fluffy) to keep warm. Set aside.

 While the rice is cooking, make the soup.

 Put the kettle on to boil. Get a large stockpot out and drizzle a little olive oil on the base, then place on a low heat to heat up. Add the onion and garlic and fry for a few minutes until starting to soften. Add the parsnips, turmeric, garam masala and curry powder and cook for a couple of minutes, until fragrant but not turning brown. You can add water if it’s starting to stick.

Add the tin of coconut cream and stir to combine. I usually swirl out the can with boiling water and add that too, but be careful – boiling water makes cans very hot to touch! You can make up your stock separately in a jug with boiling water from the kettle but I usually don’t bother (don’t want the extra washing up!)  – I add the stock powder to the mixture in the pot and then top up with the boiling water so everything is covered and the stock powder has dissolved.

Either way, everything should now be in the stockpot (except for the rice) so stir well and bring the whole lot to the boil. Turn the heat down once it reaches boiling point, and simmer on a low heat for around 35 minutes, or until the parsnips are tender. My test is to see if they fall apart when pressed with the wooden spoon.

Puree the soup, either with a handheld blender (easiest, as you don’t really have to wait for it to cool down nor reheat it once pureed) or in a food processor, in which case you’ll need to wait for the mixture to cool before blending, and then heat up again before serving.

Taste for seasoning – I find the stock powder (albeit a reduced salt one) is salty enough, but a few turns of the pepper grinder finish it off nicely. To serve, place a large spoonful of black rice in the soup bowl, then ladle the hot silky-smooth parsnip soup on top. Place a sprinkling of black rice on the top to serve.

Ideally, eat in front of the TV on a freezing cold night – it’s guaranteed to make you feel all warm and cosy inside.

my favourite reads of 2020

F6452AD6-E8DF-4B56-8C03-E3D95C94790F.JPG

To be honest, I still feel like it’s 2020 in many ways! So much of what happened last year is still continuing, in many parts of the world. I feel very lucky to be where I am, and to have made the choices I did when I did.

To my surprise, I did not read as many books in 2020 as I thought I had. Perhaps I wasn’t as diligent about recording them in Goodreads as I had been in other years. I started many books but then abandoned them, or in some cases they were automatically returned to the library before I finished them.

Having trouble focusing was a very 2020 thing, I’ve discovered.

After 2019, I boldly stated that I wanted to read more widely in 2020 and not just for comfort and escapism. That ambition was quickly shelved (no pun intended) as I took comfort and escapism wherever I could find them, like most people.

According to Goodreads, I read 99 books in 2020 - as in 2019, I didn’t really log anything I read for my studies - and of those 99:

  • 6 were re-reads (same number as last year)

  • 56 were non-fiction

  • 7 were poetry collections

  • 36 were fiction

  • 13 were by authors who identify as male

  • 83 were by authors who identify as female

  • 2 were by non-binary people

  • 7 were by people of colour.

I’m only compiling these stats because 1) I’m a stats person and 2) I’m genuinely curious about whether I read as widely and diversely as I think I do. You can’t change what you don’t know and I’m as guilty as the next white person of automatically reaching for books that reflect my worldview. That’s something I’d like to change.

But without further ado, in no particular order, these were my favourite books that I read in 2020, the strangest of years.

Wintering by Katherine May

Wintering is a delightful book that draws parallels with the way the natural world adapts to survive (and even thrive in) winter and the invariable "winters" that human beings go through in life "where you fall through the cracks for a while, and spend a season out in the cold".

In a mix of self-help, memoir and nature writing, Katherine May writes perceptively and quite beautifully about the cyclic nature of life, both in the physical world through the seasons and in our emotional landscape. Far from being bleak and depressing, winter can be a time of renewal and growth. May shares insights from her own "wintering" as well as interviews with other people who have endured extreme cold as well as extreme personal hardships.

It's a book about slowing down, surrendering, learning to be kind to yourself and embrace change, and accepting that life goes through seasons. As May writes, "once we stop wishing it were summer, winter can be a glorious season". And most importantly, like all winters, whether it be the actual season or the hard time you're experiencing, it won't last forever. The season will turn, and you will get through it. It will not always be winter. Spring will come again.

It's the perfect read for any time of year but particularly pertinent in autumn when the nights are getting darker and colder!

Small Pleasures by Clare Chambers

I absolutely adored this book. It drew me in from the first page and had me fascinated until the very end. In fact, I think I gasped aloud when I made the connection between the opening newspaper report and the sad ending I was powerless to stop!

I was a fan of Clare Chambers' earlier books and was delighted to see she had a new one out. If you're after a comforting yet gripping read where you disappear into a different time, into a world so finely drawn and filled with characters you come to care deeply about, then Small Pleasures is the book for you. Highly recommended.

The Woman who fooled the world by Nick Toscano and Beau Donnelly

This non-fiction book read like a thriller. It was so engrossing, I could barely drag myself away from it. The authors are the two journalists who uncovered the truth about Belle Gibson, the Australian woman who founded a multi-million dollar business and an incredible online following by claiming she had cured herself of brain cancer by following a wholefoods diet. If you are interested in the health and wellness space, chances are you’ll have heard of this scandal!

It turns out Belle Gibson never had cancer at all. It was an almost unbelievable deception, and yet somehow she pulled it off. How? And, perhaps more importantly, why? This book delves deep into those two questions and it makes for a real page-turner. It’s an examination of why Belle Gibson was able to successfully fool so many people, providing false hope to genuine cancer sufferers who were desperate to live and be cured, as she supposedly had.

The authors posit that Gibson’s lies and deceit are emblematic of wider failures of our consumerist society - the willingness of big companies such as Apple and Penguin Books to be seduced by an “influencer” with hundreds of thousands of followers, without once fact-checking her claims; a growing distrust of science; and how easy it is to spread misinformation through social media, to name just a few. And were Gibson’s actions the result of psychological issues (nature), of learned behaviours/how she had been raised (nurture), or was she just a psychopath?

It’s a complex, compelling story, tinged with the sad knowledge that there will be many people out there who paid the ultimate price for believing her lies.

Olive by Emma Gannon

Olive is a witty and very relatable novel that centres around a topic I have rarely seen discussed in contemporary women's fiction - not wanting to have children.

Olive is 33, climbing the ladder at the magazine she works for in London (as a former Londoner I enjoyed the setting very much!) and has just broken up with her boyfriend of nearly a decade, because he's ready for kids and she isn't. In fact, she's pretty certain she never wants to have children. This is something she struggles to find understanding about in her immediate circle of friends, and in society as a whole. Everyone has an opinion and most people in Olive's life are confident that she'll change her mind.

If you're a woman in your thirties of the same disposition as Olive, you will find a lot to relate to here. The novel is also an exploration of female friendship and how the lives of Olive and her friends go in different directions, all based on their decisions/desires to become mothers, or not. Emma Gannon captures very well the lonely feeling of being the only one in your group of friends who doesn't have children, even though it's by choice, as well as the more frustrating aspects of your friends' choices being celebrated and prioritised more when yours are questioned, judged or simply dismissed.

I have not ripped through a novel so quickly, nor related so much to a protagonist, for a long time! Any woman in the same boat as Olive will feel recognition, relief and, most importantly, less alone after reading this very enjoyable book. Not enough contemporary literature deals with this choice that more and more women are making, and the feelings of isolation that come with it, so I hope more authors are inspired to follow Emma Gannon's fine example!

Charlotte by helen Moffett

As a die-hard fan of Pride and Prejudice (and Jane Austen in general), having adored the story and characters since I was a child, I have long resisted any sequel or fan-fic by modern writers that involves reimagining this beloved story in any way. It felt like dangerous territory to me, best left alone.

However, after reading Charlotte, I'm beginning to think I've missed a trick. This book very convincingly reimagines that beloved world and characters, through the perspective of a minor character.

Charlotte gives us, as the title suggests, the untold story of Charlotte Lucas and her marriage to Mr Collins. I have long been fascinated by the character of Charlotte, whom many feminist scholars have held up over the years as a character that represents the reality that faced the majority of women, including Jane Austen herself, during that period. As appalled as Charlotte's best friend Elizabeth Bennet is at her decision to marry Mr Collins, a man Lizzy herself has rejected as repulsive, Charlotte's choice is entirely understandable. Whether she loved Mr Collins or even liked him was rather immaterial - for a 'plain' woman, marriage was her ticket out of spinsterhood, being a burden to her family (particularly her brothers who would be honour-bound to support her after the death of their father) and having an insecure future. Love was for those who could afford it.

Charlotte ends up having a very fulfilling life as mistress of her own domain, Hunsford Parsonage, and she and Mr Collins, while still over-effusive and odd, do become a good team, in marriage, life and parenthood. The details of her housekeeping and the fruits (and other products) of the estate are so interesting and enjoyable to read. And there are flashbacks to the scenes we all remember from the original told from Charlotte's perspective (and I appreciated the author's note as to why she reimagined some scenes in a certain way), so this tale is very much anchored in that universe and convincingly so. I particularly enjoyed the reappearance of Lady Catherine de Bourgh and the evolution of Anne de Bourgh's story, another minor character from the original who is brought to life and given a lot more to do in this story. It was also highly amusing to hear the fate of Lydia Bennet/Wickham!

About two-thirds of the way through, the story takes a bizarre turn which I didn’t think worked (and many other reviewers agree, I’ve noted). If you can get past that, it is still a wonderful, enthralling read that I would highly recommend to anyone who loves Pride and Prejudice but, like me, feared that reading a reimagined version of it might ruin the original. Far from it.

Life in Pieces by Dawn O’Porter

I love Dawn and her hilarious writing. And even though our lives are very different - I'm not a celebrity living in LA, married to an actor, wrangling two kids and a menagerie of crazy animals - the stories she shares are incredibly relatable.

Life in Pieces is Dawn's diary of lockdown in 2020 - she is coping with all the pandemic madness in the US, coupled with homeschooling her two children, missing the UK and her friends and family there, and trying to keep up with her own writing and workload.

Alongside the world's very public grief and unravelling, Dawn is dealing with her own very private grief and dismantling of a world she knew. Just before the pandemic hit, she lost a close friend to suicide and she finds the forced isolation of lockdown conjures up many past griefs too, particularly the loss of her mother to breast cancer when she was very young.

That said, it's also pant-wettingly funny in places, in trademark Dawn style! She is refreshingly honest about her dependence on alcohol (I found myself craving a margarita once or twice while reading this!) and recreational drugs to get her through the days, and about the antics of her two young sons and pets, and about the pressures of living life in the public eye.

It's an intense read and I probably shouldn't have read it before bed (!) - it's very visceral in places and at times I felt like I'd had a few weed gummies myself!

But ultimately, this book is a tribute to human resilience and how we can carry on in the face of confusion, fear and heartbreak. When life as we know it ends, we can persevere, we can find things to bring joy to every day, and we can still be kind and curious.

How to be Australian by Ashley Kalagian Blunt

I read this book in a day and a night, not wanting it to end. As you all probably know, a bit over two years ago I returned to live in Australia after over a decade in the UK, and while I haven't regretted that decision for a second, it has been quite the transition.

I find this wonderful country very strange at times - and struggle to explain these strange things to my equally befuddled British husband - so to read a memoir about life in Australia from a new Australian's point of view (Ashley is Canadian) was a very affirming experience.

Ashley captures perfectly the adrift feeling of life in a place that you want to belong to but can't quite find your place in. And so many of her adventures are absolutely hilarious! Highly recommended.

UNICORN BY AMROU AL-KHADI

This is a magnificent memoir that deserves a very wide audience indeed.

Amrou Al-Kadhi tells the story of how they grew up in a strict Iraqi Muslim family, in both the Middle East and in the UK, and struggled to fit into any box, norm or expectation, either from society or their family, from a very early age. Highly intelligent, talented and sensitive, Amrou fights racism and prejudice on a daily basis at their public school (showing that Eton is full of the bellends I always suspected it to be!) and hides their true self from their family, having already experienced some profoundly heartbreaking parental judgement and rejection.

At university, Amrou discovers drag. All of sudden, their true self has an outlet and life takes on new meaning and colour...and new complications as well.

I was so moved by this memoir. I can't relate to most of Amrou's experiences, nor to the common experiences of a queer person negotiating uncertainty, fear and trauma, but I certainly can relate to feeling misunderstood and rejected, especially by those we love, and the struggles to find and let our true selves shine through, and to feel safe doing so. Amrou writes with humour, wisdom and insight on what was a very painful journey but now they have found a level of self-acceptance, self-love and peace. This is a book that manages to be brutal and beautiful at the same time. Highly, highly recommended.

THROAT BY ELLEN VAN NEERVEN

One of the upsides to the 2020 lockdown was bookshops holding their launches and events online, which meant I could attend a book launch in Brisbane from my study in Hobart! One of them was the launch of this amazing collection.

Ellen Van Neerven is a skilled and lyrical poet who manages to untangle and distil the messy politics of this fractured, unreconciled land we call Australia, and the experience of being a Bla(c)k queer person within it. Van Neerven has mastered blending the personal with the political - the poems are imaginative (I particularly loved the treaty with the reader) and capture not just big issues of climate change, racism and colonialism, but also love, connection and the more quotidian aspects of life. There was so much to absorb in this collection and Ellen Van Neerven is fast becoming one of my favourite poets.

As always, I’d love to hear your favourite reads of 2020 too!