It's April 25 on Monday and it will be TEN years since I reached my goal and began living a completely different life. A sweet friend from my blogging days in Melbourne dubbed it "Phil's Revolution Day" and I thought was a most apt description!
To celebrate, The Latte Years e-book is discounted on Kindle, iBooks and Kobo all weekend!
And make sure you pop back on Monday because there will be an extra surprise for you!
Happy Phil's Revolution weekend to you all xx
The Hobart launch of The Latte Years a few months ago was not unlike a wedding - gathering in great excitement with my parents and siblings at the family home beforehand, with sparkling wine and hair and makeup preparations; a fancy car to take us right to the door; getting my photo snapped the minute I alighted outside Fullers Bookshop; speeches; even a CAKE (!); but most of all, seeing the faces of so many people I love and knowing they were all there to celebrate something very special.
Also like a wedding, it's amazing how suddenly you get so incredibly nervous, knowing that everyone's there because of you!
But it was wonderful, utterly wonderful, in every way. Like my wedding day, I'd do it all again tomorrow and wouldn't change a thing.
An aside: towards the end of 2004, as it began occurring to me that I needed to start at least trying to extricate the shit out of the blades of the fan that was my life, I joined a T.S Eliot appreciation group that met once a week at Fullers Bookshop in Collins Street, Hobart. I was the youngest person in the group, by about a quarter of a century, but I loved it. Our leader was passionate and inspiring, and it was rocket fuel for my brain that had been lying dormant since graduating from uni two years before. The discussions always ended in the Afterword Cafe, where we were given coffees and slivers of fudge. So to say it was surreal, just over 11 years later, to be back there launching my own book, is something of an understatement!
If you've ever been to Fullers, you'll know what an oasis it is. It's one of the world's loveliest bookshops, warm and comforting like a favourite relative's house, and smells like two of my most favourite things in the world - books and coffee. It was amazing to be there, and to see my book everywhere I looked!
My friend and one of my most favourite writers of all time (if you haven't read Mothers Grimm, go and get it now, it's amazing!), Danielle Wood, officially launched The Latte Years. She began by reading a poem very dear to my heart, Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken", and these are a few of the very kind words that followed:
“Phil’s story is not really so much about health, fitness and body issues, but about a journey every single one of us will understand - the journey to being the very best version of ourselves that we can possibly be. ”
“...we are, every single day of our lives, every single moment, confronted by diverging paths. The choice of what to do, what to say, what to think....with each tiny choice, we are forging our character. And that’s what The Latte Years is really all about.
..it’s not a matter of choosing the steep, difficult and challenging path once. As Phil tells us in The Latte Years, you have to keep choosing it. Every single time two roads diverge in a yellow wood. And that will make all the difference.”
And then it was my turn to say a few words and, to be honest, I was quite overcome. I felt overwhelmed with gratitude and love, for everyone in the room. A friend had flown over from New Zealand to be there, another from New South Wales, and another still had flown down from Melbourne that day as a surprise, and casually strolled into Fullers with her baby strapped to her back and into my gobsmacked, overjoyed and utterly overwhelmed arms. There were old friends there, some I've known for 30 years or more; family; former classmates, their partners and children; women who taught me in primary and secondary school; and even a handful of readers I had never met but who wanted to come and say hello (and I'm so glad they did!). It felt strange but unbelievably wonderful that this little book I had drafted and redrafted, smiled and cried over, alone in my study on the other side of the world was now out and being read. It was all now real. It had gone beyond a Word file on my Macbook and was now a real book. I was a real author. And I got to celebrate it by returning to where I'd come from, where the story began.
“Many of you would know that The Latte Years started life as a novel. Fiction is a wonderful vehicle for so many things but in this case, it was a shield. It was a way to distance myself from everything that had happened. I told myself I was trying to make it more universal but in truth it was a way of trying to rewrite the past, to bring everything to more satisfying conclusions than had been reached in real life.
But The Latte Years became the book it was destined to be, and that it needed to be. I had to write this book exactly as it is. Our stories choose us, we don’t choose them.
And the thing about being brave that we’re never told is that it’s not about feeling righteous and invincible, all swords and shields. Being brave is about putting the shield down.
I wrote this book because I knew I couldn’t possibly be the only person in the world who lost their way in their youth and life didn’t turn out as planned. I couldn’t be the only person who went through a divorce in their twenties and had to learn how to heal, trust and love again after heartbreak. I couldn’t be the only one who found out success has a dark side. I couldn’t be the only one who’s had ‘friends’ screw them over. I couldn’t be the only one who has reached a goal, that was once upon a time so out of reach, and then wondered ‘what’s next?’
And it turns out, I’m not. Far from it. The response to The Latte Years has been beyond anything I could have hoped for. I’m so happy that it’s helped so many people, because it’s also helped me. It turns out it was a book even I needed! I needed to remember the strength and power we all have to turn our lives around when we’ve lost our way. I needed to remember how empowering it is to take responsibility for your life and your choices.
Most of all, I needed reminding that the past is the past. I can’t change any of it. And now, I don’t know if I would, even if I could. Because it got me to right here, right now. And I wouldn’t change that for anything.”
And then it was time to drink wine and sign some books. By the time we reached the end of the line, my hand hadn't been that sore since university exams in 2001, but it was totally worth it. I was told I had attracted a bigger crowd than Molly Meldrum! Ha ha.
One of the things I didn't anticipate writing a memoir is how INSANELY FUN it is when so many of your 'characters' show up to your book launch...including Sarah and Dave from Canada!!
How often do you get a world famous author show up to your book launch?! I was a squealing fan-girl on the inside!
Fullers were amazing - they even did this gorgeous window display which I couldn't get enough pictures of. Occasionally I stood on the pavement and just stared at it (and got curious stares in return!).
I know it sounds silly but I'm still having moments of OH MY GOD I WROTE A BOOK IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING? and I have occasional moments of overwhelming pride and disbelief, when I see a picture of it being read somewhere, or my own copy on my shelf in my study, that I wrote that. It's still all sinking in, like I wrote in my last post.
Thank you again Fullers Bookshop and if you were there that night in Hobart, thank you for being a part of it. It was one of the happiest nights of my life.
Now how about a (virtual) piece of that amazing cake?
This past week has been one of the most surreal weeks of my life, in the best possible way. On Monday, The Latte Years came out and I felt like I did when I was a little girl and it was my birthday - absolutely beside myself with excitement and like the world was just a little bit magical.
It has been amazing and frankly mind-blowing to see pictures of The Latte Years on shelves, on Kindles, in hands.
State Theatre bookshop, Hobart. Thank you Isabel for the photo!
As crazy as this sounds, it’s still sinking in that this is real. It’s a REAL book. Even seeing these pictures I have to pinch myself a little. Possibly because the book isn’t out in bookstores here in London yet (you can get it online though), all the excitement has been happening 17,000 kilometres away. But it’s still been incredible.
Fullers Bookshop, Hobart. Thank you Rae for the photo!
On Kindle! Thanks Mezz for the photo!
Readings Malvern, Melbourne. Thank you to my friend Leanne for the photo!
You can see a whole album of where The Latte Years has been spotted all over Australia and the world on my Facebook page.
As I sat alone in my study - almost this time last year - on the other side of the world, forcing myself back into Hobart of 2005 and Melbourne of 2006, and beyond, I wondered whether this was actually going to end up being anything worth reading, whether it would help anyone, whether I was doing the right thing.
Writing The Latte Years took everything I had. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. 100 marathons would have been easier and I'd have had a more toned backside to show for it! But already, after just one week, I feel I have been repaid a thousand times over. I know it was all worth it. I’ve just been blown away by how people have reacted to this book so far - it’s beyond anything I dared to hope for.
This book goes very well with coffee. Thank you to my friend Phillippa for the photo!
Every day I’ve been waking up to messages from people who have read it. People who stayed up until 1, 2 or 3am to finish it because they couldn’t put it down. People who have gone out and bought more copies for their friends. People who now feel less alone. People who are now inspired and fired up to do something outrageous and brave with their lives.
Which is exactly why I wrote it.
The enthusiastic and loving reception my book has had so far is so incredibly humbling. I don’t think I’ve ever said the words ‘thank you’ so much in my life but it’s something I feel with every fibre of my being right now - thankful. So very, very thankful.
Have a lovely week, friends! And if you've bought a copy of The Latte Years, thank you!
Much love, Phil xx
My book, The Latte Years, is officially out in Australia and New Zealand TODAY!
It’s a time of year where a lot of people find themselves thinking about their lives, what they might like to change and do differently in the year ahead. While I don’t think you have to wait for a new year to start changing things, my aim in writing The Latte Years was to share my own story of transformation and growth, and to give hope to anyone who feels a bit stuck or powerless in their life, wanting to change but feeling too overwhelmed to even start.
I know exactly how that feels, because I've been there.
In 2005, I was, as Cheryl Strayed brilliantly put it, ‘a free spirit who didn’t have the balls to be free.’ Due to my low confidence, insecurities and fear of change, my life had moved in very unsatisfying directions. I was overweight and out of shape, breathless after climbing a flight of stairs. I was married to someone I loved but who I knew deep down didn’t want the same things as me. I yearned to see the world but the furthest I’d ever been from my hometown was Queensland. I thought this was as good as it was ever going to get. And I was only 24.
As the fog slowly lifted, I could see why things were the way they were - but that I could change them. In fact, only I could change them.
The Latte Years is the story of how I did that, and what happened next! (clue: lots of things).
But it’s not a “fat to fit” memoir, because that has only ever been one part of my story. Most weight loss success stories finish with getting to goal, the happy ever after. It wasn’t like that for me at all. In fact, merely weeks after I reached my goal, my life as I knew it was over.
What happens after the ‘after’ photo is taken? That’s what The Latte Years is really about.
It’s about going through a divorce in your twenties; starting afresh in a new city and a new country; the nuances, joys and pains of friendships; learning how to love and trust again after you’ve been hurt; the dark side of success; being true to yourself; the search for wholeness, freedom and empowerment and how you can find it in the most unexpected places.
The Latte Years was not a book I intended to write, but ended up being one that I had to write. We don’t choose our stories, they choose us. It’s the twist in the plot you don’t see coming at the time, but ends up being clearly the way things were meant to be all along.
I hope The Latte Years encourages you to cross your own finishing line, whatever it might be.
If you want to get yourself, and every single one of your friends (!), a copy, here's how:
Paperback, in Australia and New Zealand: your local bookstore should have a copy. If they haven't got it in yet, ask them to order it!
Or online, Booktopia
Paperback, rest of the world: it hasn’t been released in bookstores in the UK or US yet but if you’d still like a physical copy you can get one from Book Depository (they ship worldwide) and it also looks like you can get a paperback copy on Amazon US and Amazon UK.
E-book/Kindle: Amazon UK, Amazon US, Kobo, iBooks
Audio book (released 21 January) by Audible
If you get a copy, please tweet me, Facebook me or insta me (and hashtag #thelatteyears) - I’d love to see where it is in the world and who is reading it!
Thank you so much for all the support and being a special part of this journey. I am so grateful for you all xx
Today is New Year’s Day, 2016.
It’s been a cloudy, cold, intermittently wet day here in London. Somehow my husband and I managed to start the year without hangovers, despite drinking two bottles of champagne and chasing it down with whisky before crawling to bed around 3am. Perhaps we aren’t getting too old for this after all.
Today my husband also fixed my phone, which has been driving me batshit crazy for months. It was one of those things I just don't have time to sort out. It finally has enough memory to update all its apps. WhatsApp finally works again and in it I found many messages I had missed over the past few months, including one from a friend who, it turns out, quit her job before Christmas and is now cycling around Canada. I had no idea. I’d seen her snaps on social media but thought she was just on holiday.
I suppose that’s a metaphor for how I feel about life in general right now. I finally have enough memory, enough brain power, to plug back in to the world and life now that The Latte Years is ready to be released.
The process of having a book published has been nothing like I thought it would be, at all. Every author says that and I didn’t believe them. It’s been a rollercoaster, in the most incredible, amazing and challenging ways. One minute you’re fantasising about what it will be like to see a book with your name on the front cover. The next you’re running along a frosty street at 6:30am to get to the sorting office when it opens, because a copy of your book has arrived, but as you work full time, you weren’t home when it got there. Later that day, you’re sitting in a cafe on your lunch break, reading it, and people walk past the window, burrowing themselves deeper in their coats against the cold, back to their offices, life keeps going.
Eventually you remember to look up and sip your coffee, and it hits you that this isn’t just a book you’ve borrowed from the library. You wrote it.
Books aren’t books to you any more. You know what the author went through to write it. It is all-consuming, intense, exhilarating, powerful, exciting, frustrating, even heartbreaking. You know about deadlines, about getting up at 6am to write before work, writing in the evenings, writing for nine to ten hour stretches at the weekends, your social life dropping dead. You know about days when you forget to eat, you’re so caught up. You know about drafting and redrafting. You know about cutting 50,000 words. You know about the frustration of feeling golden sentences forming in your brain and your typing fingers not able to catch them before they slip away. You know about fighting that nagging voice in your head that tells you you’re a fraud, you’re going to be a laughing stock, that you’ll never be good enough. You know about the sick dread you feel when you realise it’s over, it's gone to print, and you’ve just thought of something else you wish you’d had time to change.
But then you realise your book is a bit like you. Flawed, but still lovable. Still able to find a place in the world. And lucky - so very bloody lucky - to have so many people who believe in it.
And that’s why I can’t wait to do it again. I’m already writing the next one.
So, that’s my wish for 2016. To keep writing. To learn, to grow, to push myself. But to keep going, above all.
What’s yours, my friend?
Much love, Phil xx
