Daphne, one of my favourite smells, and prolific at this time of year. I brought some to my office so I could smell it all day while I’m writing.
I know I say this nearly every week but I’m not entirely sure where this week has gone.
But this week I know why - because I have been putting my head down to make some serious headway on my novel. My supervisors would like to see a full draft by the end of August and so on Monday I printed out the current draft as it stands, all 370 pages of it, and have been lost in that world ever since. Hours pass and I barely move, apart from my fingers on the keyboard.
It has reminded me a lot of when I was writing The Latte Years with a short deadline, around a full time job and everything else that life in London entailed. Days became weeks very quickly.
I’ve decided for the next few weeks, while I’m ensconced in my work, that my This Week posts will be written and published on a Sunday instead of Friday (which frankly has usually meant Saturday!). That takes the pressure off considerably and allows me to devote writing time during the week to the PhD, which is absolutely where it needs to be spent.
It also means that my This Week posts might not be all that exciting for the next little while - if all I’m doing is writing, sleeping, eating and exercising, there might not be much to report! But I’m a firm believer that it’s the little details that are worth paying attention to in life, where we might see interesting patterns, and where we might learn a lot about ourselves.
Favourite experience/s of the week
I loved making some serious headway on my draft. I found myself waking in the mornings, itching to get back to it. I am delighted and frankly relieved that I’ve hit this point with it - it has been a hard slog over the past two years, where research has been so much easier than trying to enter this world with my imagination. I knew I had only got to know these people superficially - I had shaken their hands and nodded politely at them across the room, not sat beside them at a campfire or, God forbid, kicked down their bedroom doors (as the wonderful Morag Joss once instructed me to do). I had a wonderful video chat with a dear friend in London who is also a theatre director, so she is well-versed in making characters come alive. We workshopped a few ideas together and she really encouraged me to step up and take ownership of my subject as a character - I have to invent, because the historical record is so sparse.
Things I was grateful for this week
Is it lame to say my husband? He went out to get some groceries while I was working at home and I heard him come back, shuffling at the front door with the keys and bags. I hopped up and opened the door for him, and he was standing there with a huge bouquet of tulips in his arms. He never misses an opportunity to show me he’s proud of me. I’m so deeply grateful for how supportive he is.
Tea and a pile of library books. Two of my favourite things.
Reading
Honestly? 99 per cent of my reading this week has been PhD stuff. My notebooks, flicking through them looking for things I know I wrote down months ago in a flash of inspiration, or for obscure references that I thought would come in handy. Wonderful books lent to me by my supervisors, poetic deconstruction and interpretation of sparse archives. Combing through JSTOR for papers on fictive memoir and metaphorical mapping in Margaret Atwood’s Alias Grace. There hasn’t been a dull moment!
But I also like to read for pleasure as well, where I can! I got myself a pile of library books yesterday and brought them back to an empty, silent house. I put Ludovico Einaudi on the stereo, brewed a cup of tea and dove into the pile. My happy place.
I’ve already read Breathing Space which is a wonderful collection of poetry, essays, art and short fiction from Tasmanian writers and artists about our changing relationship with this state’s landscape. I adored it. And I know a few of the contributors, which is always special.
Listening to
The First Time: Masters Series - Tony Birch. I had of course heard of Tony and read his writing, but I had never listened to an interview with him before and I was spellbound. He really emphasised the importance of getting into a good working routine for your writing - whatever works for you - and I also appreciated what he said about rejection. I was still feeling sad about one I’d had the week before and his words were really bolstering - and to know that even a writer of his stature still gets turned down was very comforting!
WILD with Sarah Wilson: Ask Me Anything with Melissa Hemsley - fabulous episode, full of Sarah’s usual thoughtfulness and proactive take on life. I must admit I had been feeling a bit despairing over the climate crisis of late and listening to this made me feel hopeful again.
We Can Do Hard Things with Glenn Doyle - OMG, how had I not discovered this podcast until now?! (answer - most likely because I have not been on social media since January). Thank goodness for my walking commute! I have saved so many episodes to listen to but this week I managed both Cheryl Strayed episodes, both Liz Gilbert episodes, and the Reese Witherspoon episode. They were all fabulous and just such great reminders of how important it is to be resilient, courageous and make the contribution that you are here to make.
Best Friend Therapy: Toxic Friendships - how do we define friendship? What makes a friendship toxic? What can we do about it? - I’ve already listened to this twice so that probably tells you how deeply relatable I found this episode. I particularly appreciated their definition of friendship which was thinking of the other person with goodwill, wanting the best for them (even if it means you don’t get what you want from them) and always making generous assumptions. Life is a lot easier when you have generous assumptions! There tends to be less drama too.
Thursday’s tofu fried rice - always a favourite!
Eating
The week’s eats were:
Saturday: Pizza night with family
Sunday: I did a big cook up and made our winter favourite Pip casserole (vegan version obvs!) and Rachel Ama’s Jerk-spiced Lentils, both of which kept us going through the week! We had the casserole with chunks of homemade bread.
Monday: Jerk-spiced Lentils with coconut rice and flatbread. Seriously, every recipe of Rachel Ama’s that I’ve tried has been incredible and this was no exception. If you’re a vegan you need to get her books immediately!
Tuesday: Casserole with flatbread
Wednesday: Jerk-spiced lentils with pasta (it made a delicious pasta sauce!)
Thursday: Tofu fried rice (using leftover rice from Monday)
Friday: Sweet potato and coconut soup (loosely followed this recipe) with bread
Saturday: Nigella’s puttanesca, veganised (use 2 tablespoons of miso paste instead of anchovies) and with shredded chard from the garden added.
The bread machine has been getting a workout (it’s a wonderful enticement to get up with my alarm, as I time it to be finished at the same time. Whatever works!), I made another loaf of banana bread, and also an ill-fated tray of granola which was gutting. I prepared it so lovingly - coconut oil, vanilla and organic honey I wanted to use up melted down, stirred through nuts, almond meal, seeds and coconut into clustered sweetness - only for it to burn in the too-hot oven. The place smelled of honey, coconut and vanilla for days, the promise of what could have been hanging in the air! Sad face. I managed to salvage about half a cup of dark brown on the cusp of burnt granola, and it was pretty nice. Sigh. I will be much more careful next time and watch it like a hawk!
Watching
Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (4K Blu-Ray - Tom was keen I make the distinction, haha!) - I quite enjoyed this! The highlight was realising that one of the shady guys was Cecil the choirmaster from the Vicar of Dibley, haha!
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (iTunes) - apart from Sisters (which I may need to give another chance), I love everything Tina Fey is in and this was no exception. The year is 2003 and a news writer (Fey) stuck in a rut decides to chuck in her comfortable but depressingly mundane life, and volunteers to report from the frontline of the war in Afghanistan. Unsurprisingly, her life is utterly transformed (to put it mildly) by the experience. Admittedly a certain amount of suspension of disbelief is required when watching Anglo actors play locals but overall I found the heart of this film to be in pretty much the right place. It’s well shot, well paced and also, despite its serious subject matter, very funny in places.
Quote of the week
At the library yesterday I picked up a book I’ve read before - The Writing Life by Annie Dillard - and at random it fell open at this page when I picked it up.
“Aim for the chopping block. If you aim for the wood, you will have nothing. Aim past the wood, aim through the wood; aim for the chopping block.” - Annie Dillard
I think of this as encouragement to see the bigger picture, widening one’s perspective rather than being focused too narrowly on the wood itself - the finished work, the published book, and how it is received. Don’t worry about doing it perfectly. Focus on the act of writing itself, the chopping block.
If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re staying safe and well, wherever you are xx