Life

,

the last two weeks

,

The usual excuses, my friends! I seem to have blinked and it’s another Friday. And how is it October tomorrow?! I promise I will get back to more regular posting soon. I have two weeks to catch you up on, though there hasn’t been anything too exciting to report. Except…

Favourite experience of the last two weeks

The birth of and meeting my new nephew. Holding him, stroking his silky cheeks and downy head, marvelling at his tiny ears and fingers with those miraculous little specks of nail on them, watching his eyes flutter open and look at me. He is beautiful. I can’t wait to get to know him.

Reading

While it feels like I’ve been working non-stop (and I have!), I’ve also been reading a lot. My brain feels like it’s had some hearty meals.

I read Blueberries by Ellena Savage which I thought was excellent - so inventive, clever and affecting. I watched quite a bit of Parks and Recreation while I was reading it so somehow found myself reading this book in the voice of April Ludgate as it’s quite dry and cynical in its humour (I thought), which added to my enjoyment (though some parts of it, the first essay in particular, are not funny at all). At the same time, it’s so poetic and fragmented, and really pushes your perceptions on what you expect to find when you pick up a memoir. In fact, I started the book halfway through, because I opened the book at random and was so intrigued by what I saw, I read from there, and then went back to the beginning…which added to the slight disorientation, never quite knowing what to expect. What does it mean to write about yourself, your body, your traumas, the way you live in the world? These are questions which, on reflection, I’d like to have grappled with in a more intellectual way in my past work. The toothpaste is already out of the tube in that regard but these questions still really interest me and I love seeing how other writers play around with them. Savage is really clever and creative in how she straddles self-enquiry and enquiry about the world at large. I really loved it!

I also read Nightbitch by Rachel Yoder which I devoured in mere days. I was intrigued by a mention of it in one of Jen Campell’s videos and thought I’d check it out at the library. All I have to say is WOW. It’s a very clever and utterly surreal novel that has an element of fairytale about it (which are, after all, incredibly dark stories). It’s about an exhausted, rage-filled mother of a young child who starts turning into a dog. As in…she is literally turning into a dog. She starts growing fur, prowling the neighbourhood at night, killing small prey, and eating a lot of meat. Even her child gets in on the act! It was quite a trip to read this on Day 1 and 2 of my cycle, I have to say! Of course, it is an extended metaphor and a very, very clever one. I think every woman, mother or not, can relate to that rage that is so deep it’s in your bones at the sacrifices and behaviours that are expected of us, with or without children. Fabulous. Highly recommended!

I also started reading A.S Byatt’s latest short story collection Medusa’s Ankles which I’ve been dipping in and out of - again, very surreal fiction set in a recognisable world.

The Guardian: I enjoyed this piece on Lena Dunham, this one on writing the story of Australian history, this one on how more doctors are writing about the harsh reality of practicing medicine in this country but I particularly loved this one by writer Sarah Moss, who wrote about buying herself a small gift when at a low personal ebb:

Maybe we’re allowed to find small joys, in proportion to our situations, on a burning planet with the ancestors howling in our ears.

I was gutted to read of the death of Hilary Mantel, whose command of and passion for the craft of historical writing has had such an impact on my own work these past few years. I highly recommend all of her Reith Lectures which make for fascinating and compelling listening, in one of which she says:

You don’t become a novelist to become a spinner of entertaining lies: you become a novelist so you can tell the truth.

What an incredible human and writer she was, and what a legacy she leaves.

Sydney Review of Books: Hypocrisy, bruh! which introduced me to another (previously unknown to me) literary controversy surrounding a book I will probably never read but the real-life drama was very intriguing!

The Audacity: Not Your Gilmore Girl: A Meditation

LitHub: How dealing in facts helps fiction writers hone their craft

Listening to

Wellness Unpacked with Ella Mills: Manifesting, creating your dream life and adaptogenic mushrooms and How to lead a more fulfilled life, let go of perfection and the power of a daily gratitude practice - both very good episodes but particularly enjoyed the latter one. I should have liked to have known Sarah when I lived in the UK, I think we would have had a lot to talk about!

The Atlantic: How To Build A Happy Life: How to forgive ourselves for what we can’t change - a new to me podcast and I really enjoyed this episode.

BeWILDered: Elizabeth Gilbert gets Bewildered! Loved this one, it’s fascinating to hear what Liz has been up to and how much I relate to a lot of what she says!

The First Time: Masters Series: Sophie Cunningham - a very enjoyable window into the craft and work of a writer I have always been curious about but whose work I don’t know well. Maybe the time has come for a deep dive?

Eating (and cooking)

So many delicious things.

Creamy pumpkin risotto, pictured - absolutely scrumptious.

I made Deliciously Ella’s spiced cauliflower and cashew pilaf traybake, which was utterly divine. It’s a recipe from her new book, which I haven’t got yet - I got this recipe emailed as part of her newsletter (but I found a link online for it for you). I’ll definitely be getting the book, as hers are some of the ones I cook from the most often (and if you know me, and how many cookbooks I have, that’s saying something!).

Fennel, walnut and sun-dried tomato pappardelle from Special Guest by Annabel Crabb and Wendy Sharpe, a book on whose brilliance and delicious recipes I have waxed lyrical several times before. This is my favourite recipe from that book and one I love to make when fennel is cheap and plentiful.

Yellow split pea dhal with loads of greens from the garden and chilli - I wanted to use up a huge bag of yellow split peas that I bought during the national lockdown of 2020 when red lentils were nowhere to be seen. This cook-up helped me stock the freezer and the dhal was so nourishing and warming.

Speaking of a cook-up, I made Jamie Oliver’s pasta e ceci soup and a loaf of bread for my sister and her family for when they brought the new baby home from the hospital. I’m planning on making a vat of that soup for us too, as the sample I tasted for seasoning was very delicious indeed!

Vegan sausage rolls to watch the Grand Final with….which we ended up not watching much of at all! Sob!

We cheered ourselves up with nachos for dinner, which were heavenly as always. I used wombok cabbage instead of lettuce for a winter variation and we didn’t have any avocado in, but oddly that seemed not to matter - in fact, Tom told me he preferred it without.

I’ve also discovered Biscoff spread which is somehow vegan (how?!) and has proved to be very dangerous indeed. I made a version of peanut butter cups with it (with Biscoff instead of peanut butter, obviously) all of which disappeared far too quickly. I also made a vegan chocolate cake for a celebration and put dollops of the spread in the middle of the batter before baking. It was unbelievably good.

Vegan banana bread also made. It’s compulsory when there are spotty bananas in the fruit bowl, am I right?

Watching

We finished the whole series of Parks and Recreation for perhaps the second time this year. One of my favourites!

We finally watched the film Citizen Kane which in all honesty I had never seen - and I was astonished at how many Simpsons jokes and homages I suddenly understood, after all this time. Ahead of its time - absolutely. The greatest film ever made, as so many have claimed it to be? Not in my opinion. But worth watching all the same.

We also finished The Thick of It series which made me almost yearn for my former British workplaces in a very, very weird way. Though I don’t think I’ll ever yearn for the one that had its office inside Paddington station.

We’ve just started watching The Newsreader, which is on ABC iview here and I believe is also on BBC iPlayer in the UK. It’s just brilliant. If you liked Morning Wars (which is what it’s called here, because we have a show called The Morning Show, which is what it’s called everywhere else), you will love this - I think it’s even better, in many respects. We’re two episodes in and I’m already hooked. The series is set in Australia in 1986 and there’s something quite surreal about watching something set in a place and time when you were a young child and realising how much of it you remember.

Picking

Rainbow chard, silverbeet, cavolo nero. I also picked a big bunch of celery for my dad. In the garden itself I planted some broad beans and marked out a spot for my potatoes. Soon it will be time for spring planting!

Moving

I’ve felt like doing a lot of yoga this week - I really love Jessica Richburg’s channel on Youtube. She has a lot of lovely gentle practices. I don’t know if it’s a coincidence but ending my work day with some gentle yin yoga has also coincided with me sleeping better than usual. So I’ll be curious to keep that practice up!

Noticing

Magnolias in full bloom, everywhere. How the air when you go outside at night is fragrant with jasmine and wattle flowers. How alive everything suddenly looks and feels after a long winter. And yet, the minute you change your bedsheets back to the spring and summer ones, the nights suddenly dip back to a freezing two degrees!

Quote of the week

It had to be Hilary, of course. There were so many I could have picked but this one felt apt:

“The things you think are the disasters in your life are not the disasters really. Almost anything can be turned around: out of every ditch, a path, if you can only see it.” - Hilary Mantel

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! Wishing you all a happy and safe weekend, filled with enjoyable things xx

,

this (last) week

,

Winter greens still going strong…

As I’m writing this on a Monday, it should be called Last Week! I’ve settled for the title above, as you see. I hope to get back to my regularly scheduled posting soon. Things have been a little crazy but I’m not complaining.

We’re currently waiting for a new nephew to be born - today is his due date - and very excited at the prospect of baby cuddles again! Wriggly toddler cuddles are, of course, great too but there’s something so special about cradling a brand new human in your arms. Expect that to be my “favourite experience of the week” in an upcoming post!

Favourite experience/s of the week

Finding out I was successful in my application for a 2023 Residential Fellowship at the Katharine Susannah Prichard Centre in Western Australia! Next year I’ll be working on my novel there for two weeks. To say I’m EXCITED and THRILLED and HONOURED would be an understatement!! More details to come on this soon.

A quieter but no less gratifying achievement was looking back through my journal volume before last - written in April sometime, I think - and seeing a list of four things I wanted to do this year, in terms of my writing, career and PhD progress. As of yesterday, I’ve done all four. I’m very, very chuffed. I’ll write more about this at some point because there have been some pretty seismic shifts for me of late, but all four goals were only to do with my output. There weren’t to do with anything happening beyond putting my hat in the ring, or reaching a certain milestone. Surprise surprise, these things are achievable with enough discipline. And achieving them has given me confidence to set my sights higher.

And, far out, the lifestyle gurus and self-made millionaires might be on to something - writing your goals down is pretty bloody powerful.

Reading

Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory by Sarah Polley - I read this at Tom’s insistence, as he thought I would get a great deal out of it. What can I say, he knows me!

I only knew Sarah Polley from her work on the Ramona TV series I watched and enjoyed as a child. I remember wanting to be an actor myself quite desperately as a child and lamenting that we lived in a part of the country where as far as I was aware there was no, or rarely any, call for child actors. I would read about stars of TV shows I watched avidly, children my age or a bit older, and about how the entire family was moved to Sydney or Melbourne for their career. I occasionally wondered why my parents hadn’t done the same - I had, after all, wowed audiences with my performance in The Emperor’s New Clothes. Having read Sarah Polley’s memoir, I am so deeply grateful my parents just let me be a kid and perform at school or in the backyard with my sisters!

Polley’s experiences are quite heartbreaking to read - how she was exploited and vulnerable for most of her early career, pushed to her physical limits, struggling with the tragic death of her mother when she was only 11, and how most of the adults around her, including directors, producers and her own parents, failed to protect her from, as she puts it, an industry that was built on exploitation. She writes with such fierce intelligence, and with the benefit of both hindsight and now being a parent herself, about these difficult years and experiences, creating a dialogue between the past and the present:

These are the most dangerous stories of my life. The ones I have avoided, the ones I haven't told, the ones that have kept me awake on countless nights. As these stories found echoes in my adult life, and then went another, better way than they did in childhood, they became lighter and easier to carry.

I think that’s what I found so admirable about the book - that Polley unpacks these painful “dangerous” stories in the present, advocating for her younger self and giving her the voice she didn’t have at the time. Polley doesn’t vilify (all of) the people who should have known better or protected her; she even questions and acknowledges the fallibility of her own memory at times. A side effect of trauma, after all, is selective memory as a form of self protection. But it is in the aftermath of a serious concussion that Polley, as she struggles to recover, is urged not to lie in dark rooms and succumb to her symptoms. Rather, in order to recover, she needed to “run towards the danger”. She would only regain strength by pushing through and doing things that were painful. It worked, and so Polley applied the same philosophy to other traumas in her life. The result is a beautifully written, moving meditation on memory, resilience, vulnerability, strength, and coming to terms with painful things. Highly recommended!

I also finished an ARC of Free to Go: Across the World on a Motorbike by Esa Aldegheri, which is out in the UK now and is being published in Australia in November. It’s a very cleverly written travel memoir that, a bit like Sarah Polley’s book, sets up a dialogue between the past and present. Trapped in lockdown in Scotland in 2020, Aldegheri finds herself homeschooling three children and lamenting her lost freedom, not just related to the pandemic but due to Brexit and the rising xenophobia associated with it. She remembers a wild, freeing adventure she and her now husband took some years earlier, riding a motorbike from Italy to New Zealand - a motorbike she was the primary rider of. Aldegheri ponders the idea that women are expected to ride in the sidecar of a motorbike (referred to as riding pillion) as well as in the sidecar of life; their desires and dreams often being secondary, especially once motherhood enters the equation. The book switches back and forth from the exhilaration of the open road, travelling through remote Central Asia, India, China and then Australia; to the mundane, stultifying reality of pandemic living. Though, Aldegheri wonders, how free was she in the first place - as a woman, a mother, a European who has made her life in a country that has left the European Union? Even on her incredible adventure, before marriage and children, there were still constraints and borders that were hard to cross. How do you navigate the world, literally and metaphorically, as a free-spirited woman? As you can imagine, I related hard to a lot of Aldegheri’s observations!

Listening to

The usual writing playlists - I have grown particularly attached to an old Nils Frahm favourite, Corn. I vividly remember standing on a platform at Moorgate station back in the day, waiting for a delayed train, and having it on repeat. I couldn’t find it on streaming for years and was delighted to rediscover it a few weeks ago.

I am also halfway through this amazing episode of Between the Covers: there is honestly so much to unpack here. I have long been a fan of “The Hero’s Journey” both as a narrative device and as a spiritual philosophy, but I had never appreciated how rooted in colonialism (and conquering) it is. This is a fascinating conversation and I am excited to write more of my thoughts about the “Carrier Bag Theory of Fiction” because I think it definitely applies to the novel I’m writing at the moment.

Favourite Friday Night Fodder!

Eating

I’ve got to start taking pictures of every meal again - it’s a very reliable memory jog!

Monday: Chilli made with black beans, kidney beans, leftover mushroom and walnut ragu and leftover homemade salsa, served with brown rice, coconut yoghurt and pickled jalapeños

Tuesday: Pasta with sunflower seed pesto

Wednesday: Roasted tofu, carrot and pumpkin with satay sauce and rice

Thursday: Both of us worked late, so it was DUMPLINGS (ready in 10 minutes)

Friday: Beetroot quinoa burgers (I loosely used a Deliciously Ella recipe - I subbed the quinoa for leftover brown rice) and homemade vegan mayo with fresh basil - OMG both were amazing! The mayo is keeping well.

Saturday: Sweet potato mac and cheese

Sunday: Leftover sweet potato Mac and cheese, turned into a bake (with breadcrumbs and cheese on top), with cavolo nero on the side

I made a delicious homemade dipping sauce for the dumplings on Thursday based on the OTK bang bang noodles sauce recipe, which is equal parts tahini, soy sauce, rice wine vinegar and a splash of maple syrup. There was plenty leftover so we’ll use that for a stir fry noodle dish this week.

I also made Deliciously Ella’s nut butter chocolate chip cookies - well, my version thereof! Added a few extra bits and pieces, and they were divine. We had no self control around them, the whole batch was gone by Saturday!

Watching

Thor: Love and Thunder (4K Blu Ray) - I’ve never been disappointed by a Taika Waititi film (or by anything involving him, his TED talk is hilarious!) and this one was no exception. You know you’re in for a wacky, laughter-filled ride. Thor Ragnarok is one of our favourite Marvels, and we wondered how on earth Taika would top that - the answer is with Thor (Chris Hemsworth) seeking inner peace; his ex Jane (Natalie Portman) coming back into his life in a very powerful form but hiding a painful secret of her own; a disappointing meeting with Zeus (Russell Crowe), “never meet your heroes",” Thor laments afterwards; a terrifying villain in Gorr the God Butcher (Christian Bale) whom you manage to feel a little empathy for; and some screaming goats who made Tom and I lose it every time they appeared. The soundtrack is awesome - it’s basically 80s and 90s rock, dominated by Guns N Roses - and it just manages to be both funny and moving at the same time, like most of Taika Waititi’s work. There’s some wonderful symbolism, I thought, about children being at the mercy of adults when it comes to real crises that are going to affect them in the future (climate change, for example) and it also sets up a sequel that has the potential to be equally hilarious!

Best Sellers (iTunes) - Tom and I synced up our in-flight TVs so we could watch this together on the plane to London four months ago, and we really enjoyed it, so we were keen to give it another watch in the comfort of our own home and without the need for subtitles! It was wonderful to see it again and absorb its quiet brilliance and admire the direction and acting. Ambitious young editor Lucy Standbridge (Aubrey Plaza) has inherited her father's publishing house, and things are not going well. Every book she publishes is universally panned by critics and book-tubers and the publishing house is on its last legs financially. She discovers she is owed a book by Harris Shaw (Michael Caine), an utterly cantankerous, alcoholic, reclusive author who originally put the company on the map decades earlier but hasn’t published a book (or been seen) since. Desperate to save the company, Lucy insists Harris honour his contract and release a new book; she makes no edits on the proviso that he comes with her on what turns out to be the book tour from hell. Very funny and touching, and genuinely surprising in places, I enjoy any movie about a writer, even a washed-up, booze-addled old curmudgeon like Harris, who is played brilliantly by Michael Caine.

The original blog banner from 2005…..

Grateful for

I just realised as I was writing that on this day in 2005 (SEVENTEEN years ago?!) that I published my first ever blog post. Seventeen years. I had only been alive for a bit longer than that at the time!

What seemed like a very small thing ended up being one of the most momentous things I’ve ever done. It changed the course of my life. Who knows where I would be right now without it. I am very grateful for that, and for everyone who has read and continued to read my work over the years, who continues to offer support and encouragement to this day. It is so very special to still hear from people who have been reading since the very beginning. You know who you are. I am so, so humbled that you’re still here. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Admittedly, I have had moments over the years where I deeply regretted starting that blog too - moments where I felt overexposed and attacked, frightened and vulnerable; when that world was very new and not very many people could relate to or understand some of the things I had to deal with. I’ve also sometimes wished that I had known how dangerous it can be to start a narrative about your body in public. But, as Sarah Polley said in an interview about her book, I’m very happy with my life as it is right now so it’s hard to feel regret about anything in the past. It’s also hard to regret the decision when, as I mentioned above, I still hear from lovely people all over the world who are still on the journey with me, people who have been some of my most generous friends and cheerleaders over the years. The good has far outweighed the not so good. There are things I’d do differently, with the benefit of hindsight, of course. But no regrets. Only gratitude.

Quote of the week

“You cannot use someone else’s fire: you can only use your own.” - Audre Lorde. The quote continues: “in order to do that, you must first be willing to believe you have it.”

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you find things to savour and ponder and that give you joy this coming week xx

all the lives we live

Cooking with Theo Randall in London, 2013. Photo by Soolin Cottle.

Sometimes I look back at pictures of things I’ve done, people I’ve met, experiences I’ve had, and I have to pinch myself a little. I can’t quite get my head around it. Was that me? Did that really happen?

I’m stunned by all the lives we live. And stunned that there are more, undoubtedly, to come.

,

this week and last week

,

Has spring sprung? It’s still pretty bloody cold down here…

What can I say, things have been a bit crazy! Here we go…

Favourite experience/s of the past two weeks

It would have to be our 12th wedding anniversary, which was on the first day of September, and which, predictably, was freezing and a washout (we didn’t think when we got married in the UK’s late summer that one day we might move back to Australia!) so our plans for a romantic day out in the open air were shelved for another time. We stayed close to home instead - we had lunch out at a nice place that was only a short walk away and then went to the movies! The rain had finally stopped as we walked home at dusk, hand in hand, bundled up in our winter coats. Tom also surprised me with a bouquet of flowers the size of a small child, which were stunning and has lasted the best part of two weeks!

Last week was also the anniversary of our first date so Tom and I have also now been together for 15 years, over a third of our lives, which I find staggering in many respects. We’re still finding new things to get excited about, new adventures to plan, and we never tire of hearing each other’s stories or run out of things to say. It shouldn’t surprise me, but it does. Perhaps it’s because of everything I went through before I met him, but I never take having a happy, solid marriage for granted. Even through the harder, darker times we’ve faced as a couple - things I know previous relationships would have well and truly crumbled under the pressure of - we are still standing and, despite everything this strange and relentless year has thrown at us, we are actually happier than ever. He truly is the best thing that ever happened to me. I’ve felt very lucky these past few weeks.

Reading

The last week of August/first week of September was all about getting my first draft to my supervisors so if I read anything that week, it was just my own words, over and over, wondering how I might ever entice some magic out of the mess that a first draft invariably is. But my primary supervisor kindly texted me a few days later saying she’d read it already (!) and enjoyed it, so I have been breathing a little easier since then!

But I finished Dessa’s book which I mentioned in the last this week, and I also started at Tom’s recommendation (insistence!) Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory by Sarah Polley. Tom bought this book because of the Baron Munchausen film connection (which he loved as a child) but ended up being very moved it and thinks I will enjoy it, so I’ll report back!

I also read my friend Fiona’s debut cookbook From Scratch which was absolutely wonderful, just as I had anticipated. If you want to learn how to make some pantry staples from scratch that not only work out cheaper but better for you to boot, this is the book you need. Whether it’s yoghurt, peanut butter or rice crackers, you’ll find a simple and yummy-sounding recipe in here. I also loved reading some of my favourites of Fiona’s stories she shared back in the ye olde blogging days!

And of course we had the sad news of the Queen’s death last Thursday - I have found myself on the Guardian website more often over the past few days than in many previous weeks combined! I found this piece by Jeanette Winterson and this one by Nesrine Malik the standouts of everything I’ve read. Quite different opinions, but I agree with both of them. Charles III has previously shown himself to be an ally of the climate and committed to diversity. Now he is King I really hope he continues to be so.

Listening to

How to Fail: Jarvis Cocker, whose book I am also currently reading. Always a pleasure to hear Jarvis and his invariably funny and thoughtful musings. And yes, I am on a first name basis with him because we once spoke at a Foyles event some years ago, haha! I particularly appreciated what he had to say about being vulnerable in your creative work, as I had just sent my supervisors my first draft and was quietly terrified:

[to be creative]…you have to be vulnerable and also open to making a fool of yourself. You have to feel like you’re walking on a tightrope and you could fall off and it will all be a disaster. But that’s what you have to do otherwise what you’re writing about, singing about, making films about, painting…it isn’t going to mean anything. It’s got to mean something to you first for it then to mean something to another…I think there’s a Leonard Cohen quote that says ‘anyone can show a scar, but it takes courage to show a pimple.’

That made me feel a lot better. Author Andrea Eames, who I interviewed for my own podcast nearly 10 years ago now, also said something similar in my interview with her, which I’ve borne in mind over the last few intense months of writing and in the queasy moments that followed pressing “send” on the draft:

I felt like I was free-falling…and I sort of feel like you have to feel like that when you're writing. If you don't feel terrified of what you're doing, it’s probably not very good. I think you sort of need to be uncomfortable and off your guard and vulnerable to write anything worthwhile.

I have to keep reminding myself that books are slippery things - they often won’t be what you thought or hoped they would be - and that no one will give me permission to write this book. Confidence is something I have to choose, and I also have to hold my nerve, every step of the way. What an education this is proving to be!

Best Friend Therapy: Transactional analysis therapy - another fascinating episode, which explored the role of our various internal voices and how we can find our way to a nurturing and calm adult way of seeing things.

Picking

I took advantage of a warm day when I wasn’t feeling too under the weather (I caught a cough off my sister - but it was not covid!) to tidy up the garden, dig in some compost and mulch with seaweed which Dad brought round. I picked some very healthy looking nettles which were growing wild in the garden, and a random carrot which I don’t remember planting! The celery and rainbow chard continue to produce well. I haven’t had to buy celery all year thanks to my amazing plants! The leaves are also a great substitute for parsley too (which hasn’t grown very well for me - maybe I don’t wear the trousers in this house after all! [that’s an old wives tale]).

Eating

We had lunch outside at the start of the week, for the first time since April, but it’s been freezing pretty much every day since! Typical mercurial spring weather!

I made some rather lovely nettle soup from the nettles (pictured) which had an almost broccoli taste, which was really delicious.

Other yummy things I’ve made over the past two weeks (not all of them photographed, alas!):

  • Emma Galloway’s dhal with roasted cauliflower on the side

  • A rather epic apple crumble

  • Lime and ginger loaf cake

  • Sweet potato mac and cheese (veganised, which I think I now prefer to the original!)

  • Curried pumpkin, lentil and cauliflower soup

  • Vegetable cashew noodle stir fry (not dissimilar to this, just without tofu)

  • Tofu and rice with satay sauce (also from Emma Galloway’s latest book)

  • Vegan pizzas (still loving the mushroom, green olive and basil pesto combo)

  • Deliciously Ella’s mushroom and walnut ragu

We also tucked into some of the vegan chocolate stash we brought back from the UK!

If you would like any of the recipes for the dishes above that I made up, including the nettle soup, do let me know and I will happily write them up…provided I wrote down what I did of course, haha!

Watching

We have seen quite a few films these past few weeks.

Three Thousand Years of Longing (at the cinema) - this was our anniversary treat, and as it was a rainy Thursday afternoon we (almost) had the entire cinema to ourselves. Anything with Tilda Swinton and Idris Elba in it is going to be good, am I right? This was just what I was in the mood for - a well-crafted and acted film with a big brain and surreal/fantastical elements. An accomplished, outwardly content but somewhat lonely scholar (Swinton) buys an artefact in an Istanbul bazaar while there on a conference (she is a narratologist). Back at her hotel room she cleans the artefact, and a Djinn (Elba) appears, offering her three wishes in exchange for his freedom. Anyone expecting a “adult version of Aladdin” as I saw the film referred to in some reviews might be disappointed. It’s actually a very intellectual (as well as visually stunning) exploration of what stories mean and what cultural functions they serve (as cautionary tales, to maintain the status quo, etc). It also examines the idea that unless love is given freely, it isn’t really love at all (in other words, you cannot wish for it). Visually arresting, ambitious in scope and very funny in places, it’s a wonderful film to escape into. I really loved it.

Jurassic World Dominion (4K Blu Ray) - Tommy’s choice, you’ll not be surprised to hear, haha! Getting the original cast back together for this film was the main attraction for me, as I imagine it was for many, and Jeff Goldblum delivers even the most mundane lines in his usual scene-stealing way. Especially when he says: “Jurassic World. Not a fan.” Hahaha! But overall, despite the dazzling animatronics and some genuinely terrifying moments, it wasn’t my favourite of the franchise. Good fun though!

The Flipside (DVD) - OMG, what a find this was. Tom had gone into JB Hifi to get Jurassic World and while I was waiting for him to find it, I spotted this. Reading the synopsis, I was immediately intrigued. An Australian film, set in Adelaide and the Barossa, with all the ingredients of a Phil film - comedy, romance, food and wine, road trips, missed chances, the complicated emotional lives of women. A no-brainer, frankly! The minute it started playing, I knew we were going to enjoy it. It was very charming, clever, well-acted and the right amount of quirky. It reminded me a lot of one of my all time favourite films, Sideways. And yes, we watched it while drinking a Barossan shiraz and a meal that included quite a few Maggie Beer products - I like to team the evening meal with the theme of our chosen film!

I’ve become a little obsessed with Marion Pilowsky’s (the director) back catalogue - she has a lot of very funny and clever short films available on Youtube. I really related to what Marion said about why she made The Flipside:

After working in London for many years I returned to my hometown of Adelaide to focus on writing and directing. In the beginning it really struck me how alien I felt after being away for so long. As I readjusted the vast differences in culture and mind-set between Europe and Australia, it gave me an idea for a story that I felt many could relate to - the visitors from hell. This is a film about finding your true home, love, sex, food and bloody good Shiraz, as well as being my own personal ode to Australia.

She’s pretty much described the sequel to The Latte Years (which may or may not be in the works)!

Honestly, nothing makes me happier than discovering a funny, well-written, truly enjoyable film - and the fact it was written and directed by an Australian woman is a wonderful bonus. From what I could tell it wasn’t particularly well reviewed and I can’t really understand why - I guess people just didn’t get it. But I got it wholeheartedly! I urge you, if you’re in Australia, to seek it out - I don’t think you’ll be disappointed. And Castle fans, you’ll spot a beloved actor from that film in this one and he uses profanity in exactly the same hilarious way. Let me know if you check it out!

Grateful for

Good health (well, the knowledge that a hacking cough is just that and it will pass). A loving husband and family. Friends who show they care. That I live somewhere safe and uncrowded, where the streets are so silent at night you would think you were the only person living there. A roof over my head, food on the table, clean water, a warm bed. The usual suspects!

As I think I’ve hinted at quite a bit in my This Week posts, 2022 has not been an easy year. But, in my stronger, more clear-headed moments, I like to think I have grown more resilient because of it, and I have also been shown that I have a choice where my energy goes. I cannot control how anyone else has chosen to behave but I can choose how much energy I give to things that are, at the end of the day, not actually about me at all. It’s so easy to get bogged down in dramas and doubts, but life is not a guarantee, it is a gift and should be lived with reverence for what matters most. “Be here now” is my most oft-repeated mantra in meditation and it does help ground me. I am truly grateful for all the moments of enlightenment, in whatever form they’ve come, that have led to greater awareness and resilience.

Quote of the week

“We are what we believe we are.” - C.S Lewis

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re all keeping safe and well xx

,

this week

,
A white woman with blonde hair playing tug of war with a golden retriever dog.

Tug of war with a very cute golden retriever!

Well, even with an alteration to my publishing schedule, I’m still a day late with my This Week post because this weekend just gone involved back-to-back social engagements which I don’t think has happened since…early 2020?! It felt like our first “normal” weekend in a very long time which was very strange (and tiring) but also lots and lots of fun.

Tom snapped the picture above on Saturday as we took a dear friend out for her 40th birthday and then had sunset drinks back at hers with her adorable dog, which made both Tom and I want one of our own very much. There might be a visit to the Hobart Dog’s Home very soon.

Much like last week, this one passed in a blur of work, deadlines and trying to dress appropriately for the weather, and not always succeeding. Not that I’m complaining about those beautiful late winter days that Hobart does so well, where the sky is so clear and blue it’s like glass, the sun is out but the air is still cool, and the gardens are a riot of pink, white and yellow blossoms. They are golden days, indeed.

Favourite experience/s of the week

Apart from spending time with friends and family, it would have to be printing out a full draft of my PhD novel, having literally cut and pasted and reorganised it into its relevant sections so I know where the gaps are, and feeling very excited that I might have hit on its title, at long last. Tom took a picture of me to mark the occasion!

There were many long days with the book this past week, days where I wrote 500 words but then deleted another 2000, which can be very disheartening. But the draft is slowly taking shape. It’s difficult but ultimately very satisfying work.

Reading

I finished an ARC of Cat Lady by Dawn O’Porter (coming out in October) which was, like all Dawn’s novels, compelling and hilarious but also perilously on the edge of disturbing in places. This novel is a really interesting deconstruction of the “cat lady” stereotype (and other stereotypes too) as well as an exploration of mental health, grief, trauma and abuse of power, as well as the powerful love and bond one can have with animals who, let’s face it, tend to love a bit more unconditionally than humans do. I really enjoyed it but did find myself absolutely cringing at one point, wondering how far Dawn was going to go with it! I do admire authors who are braver than I ever would be!

I also started reading a memoir, My Own Devices by Dessa, which I ordered from the US, and am adoring it so far. Deeply intelligent and thoughtful writing about life as a working musician as well as a woman who is curious about her parents, her upbringing, science, psychology, heartache, the search for happiness as well as the search for what is real. I believe she has a podcast too so I’ll be seeking that out!

Plus the usual PhD reading - my favourite was Spontaneous Particulars: The Telepathy of Archives by poet Susan Howe, which was a stunning exploration of what it is like to work with archives, how these dusty folders and piles of papers are in fact alive, full of stories and mysteries. She also captures the surprises, the chance encounters, and the occasional shocks one can have when working with an archive. It was a real inspiration for my exegetical work.

Amy Letter: Quitting Social Media Part One and Part Two - I recently discovered Amy and her work, and these posts on quitting social media were, I’m sure you won’t be surprised, deeply relevant and resonant for me!

Listening to

Inspired by my reading, I’ve been listening to a lot of Dessa and Amanda Palmer, as well as my usual writing and running music. Perhaps the musicians I’ve been drawn to this past week are also reflective of the fact that I’ve reached a point in my manuscript where my main character is - inasmuch as she could in 1820s Hobart Town - fighting back against prejudice and oppressive stereotypes and expectations, attempting to contextualise and give a voice to her pain and trauma. Reading Dessa’s memoir has made her music more meaningful for me, and I particularly identify with her saying that her work seems to have recurring themes, a persistent thread of sadness and heartache. I have found the same with my own body of work. I had thought after writing The Latte Years that I might be done with its themes, but no - they appear persistently in everything I write. I too seem destined to keep striking the same bell and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I write to work through things, to understand and process them. Things I know so many other women have grappled with too - even women who lived 200 years ago. I think that’s one of my main drivers for my current novel, that a story of female resilience from colonial Australia can have so much resonance for women now…well, it certainly does for me.

Best Friend Therapy: Divorce - is it failure or evolution? How does it affect wider relationships? Is there a way to divorce well? I always enjoy this podcast and have listened to some episodes many times over, but this was probably the least resonant episode for me so far. I found that surprising, as I expected to relate hard to the subject matter but instead found it was all stuff I had dealt with a long time ago and didn’t feel the need to rake over again. Which is definitely a good thing! Listening to this episode made me feel very grateful, and not for the first time, that if getting divorced was a life experience I was always destined to have, that it happened to me in my twenties. It was painful enough when the whole relationship had been relatively short; from what I can tell it’s even harder when you’ve been together for decades and have all of the collateral that a shared life of that length entails. The emotional pain of a marriage breakdown, even when you know it’s for the best, is not something I’d wish on anyone but I hope that the stories I’ve shared over the years prove that you can thrive on the other side of it.

The First Time: Kate and Katherine catch up + featured book, Denizen by James McKenzie Watson I always enjoy this podcast and now that I’m not on social media anymore, I like to listen to their catch-up episodes as well to find out what these two very interesting and lovely-sounding writers get up to and are inspired by.

WILD with Sarah Wilson: Mark O’Connell, meet the apocalypse preppers - far out, this was an eye-opener! I found the discussion about how the world’s super-rich are buying up land in New Zealand to escape the apocalypse could be viewed as a second wave of colonialism very, very interesting and noted many parallels with what I’ve observed happening in Tasmania since the start of the pandemic.

Wellness Unpacked with Ella Mills (formerly the Deliciously Ella podcast): How to change habits, taking life off hold and mindful eating with Shahroo Izadi - I loved this interview. Shahroo is fantastic - her first interview with Ella a few years ago was one of my favourites of the earlier seasons and she’s yet again right on the money with her observations and advice. Really inspiring and a great listen.

Eating

Gosh, this is always a long section isn’t it? How un-shocking! Once more, it was a case of cooking up on Sunday and eating the results for most of the week though there were a few surprises in there too. No baking this week, though I had plenty of last week’s lime and ginger cake and the week before’s vegan gingerbread to nibble at. I’ve been reading a wonderful vegan baking book and am keen to try a few of the recipes.

Friday’s lunch - vegetables, chickpeas and noodles which tasted so incredible!

Sunday: Minestrone soup

Monday: We had our friend Jack over for dinner and I made a couple of vegan curries - a simple potato one and a dal makhani (based on Dishoom’s recipe for their house black dal, though to be honest I mostly looked at the back of the packet of dal makhani spices I bought from a specialist spice shop in Moonah!), which we had with rice, spicy apple chutney I made last autumn and flatbreads. It was quite a feast! I can’t believe I didn’t take any photos…but that’s what being off social media does to you, haha!

Tuesday: Tofu fried rice (to use up the leftover rice)

Wednesday: Potato curry

Thursday: Gnocchi with pesto, rocket and aged walnut cheese that all needed using up - delicious!

Friday: Broccoli miso pasta (OMG this was amazing and I will totally be writing up the recipe)

Broccoli miso pasta. So divinely creamy and indulgent, I found it hard to believe it was vegan!

Saturday: Homemade pizza - which we hadn’t had in SO long and I am definitely bringing back!

Lunch out at Frogmore Creek on Saturday. Arancini balls - but the apple and fennel salad in the middle was the real star of the show!

Sunday: Leftover homemade pizza!

But I was most impressed with lunches this week as well - particularly Friday’s where, craving something green and wholesome, I cooked some green vegetables with a can of chickpeas, added them to some rice vermicelli noodles, dressed the whole lot with soy and chilli, and scattered the top with pumpkin seeds. So nourishing and delicious!

We also had a lovely meal out on Saturday at Frogmore Creek, a winery about half an hour away, one of our favourite places.

Drinking

We had some very nice wines on Saturday and I also had some whisky for the first time all year! I felt I couldn’t really get to the end of winter without indulging at least once. I had missed that delicious burn in the throat.

During the day it’s been tea, tea and more tea - chai, Bengal spice, and ginger mostly. Anything warming.

Picking

The usual suspects - celery, chard and perpetual spinach - but this week we noticed the rhubarb is back! I’m not sure if I can pick it to eat this year or whether I have to wait another year (I planted it last year) but it looks very robust and healthy. I’m quite excited for spring planting now - just need to dig some more compost in and my beds will be good to go.

Watching

The usual suspects, though we’re now on to The Thick of It as well as our current favourites. We haven't quite had the headspace for films (well, I’m speaking for myself here - Tom always has the headspace for films!) of an evening after the long days we’ve had, so something hilarious has been just the ticket.

Wearing

My coat, scarf and hat for half the week, and then not!

A gorgeous comfy red floral dress I bought from Seasalt Cornwall, my favourite UK clothing brand, when we were there a few months ago. I can’t find a link to it, it would appear the seasons have definitely changed now!

Grateful for

My husband, my family, caring friends, my good health - the usual suspects!

Quote of the week

“No need to hurry. No need to sparkle. No need to be anybody but oneself.” - Virginia Woolf

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re also finding things to savour and ponder, that give you joy and nourishment xx