Has spring sprung? It’s still pretty bloody cold down here…
What can I say, things have been a bit crazy! Here we go…
Favourite experience/s of the past two weeks
It would have to be our 12th wedding anniversary, which was on the first day of September, and which, predictably, was freezing and a washout (we didn’t think when we got married in the UK’s late summer that one day we might move back to Australia!) so our plans for a romantic day out in the open air were shelved for another time. We stayed close to home instead - we had lunch out at a nice place that was only a short walk away and then went to the movies! The rain had finally stopped as we walked home at dusk, hand in hand, bundled up in our winter coats. Tom also surprised me with a bouquet of flowers the size of a small child, which were stunning and has lasted the best part of two weeks!
Last week was also the anniversary of our first date so Tom and I have also now been together for 15 years, over a third of our lives, which I find staggering in many respects. We’re still finding new things to get excited about, new adventures to plan, and we never tire of hearing each other’s stories or run out of things to say. It shouldn’t surprise me, but it does. Perhaps it’s because of everything I went through before I met him, but I never take having a happy, solid marriage for granted. Even through the harder, darker times we’ve faced as a couple - things I know previous relationships would have well and truly crumbled under the pressure of - we are still standing and, despite everything this strange and relentless year has thrown at us, we are actually happier than ever. He truly is the best thing that ever happened to me. I’ve felt very lucky these past few weeks.
Reading
The last week of August/first week of September was all about getting my first draft to my supervisors so if I read anything that week, it was just my own words, over and over, wondering how I might ever entice some magic out of the mess that a first draft invariably is. But my primary supervisor kindly texted me a few days later saying she’d read it already (!) and enjoyed it, so I have been breathing a little easier since then!
But I finished Dessa’s book which I mentioned in the last this week, and I also started at Tom’s recommendation (insistence!) Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory by Sarah Polley. Tom bought this book because of the Baron Munchausen film connection (which he loved as a child) but ended up being very moved it and thinks I will enjoy it, so I’ll report back!
I also read my friend Fiona’s debut cookbook From Scratch which was absolutely wonderful, just as I had anticipated. If you want to learn how to make some pantry staples from scratch that not only work out cheaper but better for you to boot, this is the book you need. Whether it’s yoghurt, peanut butter or rice crackers, you’ll find a simple and yummy-sounding recipe in here. I also loved reading some of my favourites of Fiona’s stories she shared back in the ye olde blogging days!
And of course we had the sad news of the Queen’s death last Thursday - I have found myself on the Guardian website more often over the past few days than in many previous weeks combined! I found this piece by Jeanette Winterson and this one by Nesrine Malik the standouts of everything I’ve read. Quite different opinions, but I agree with both of them. Charles III has previously shown himself to be an ally of the climate and committed to diversity. Now he is King I really hope he continues to be so.
Listening to
How to Fail: Jarvis Cocker, whose book I am also currently reading. Always a pleasure to hear Jarvis and his invariably funny and thoughtful musings. And yes, I am on a first name basis with him because we once spoke at a Foyles event some years ago, haha! I particularly appreciated what he had to say about being vulnerable in your creative work, as I had just sent my supervisors my first draft and was quietly terrified:
[to be creative]…you have to be vulnerable and also open to making a fool of yourself. You have to feel like you’re walking on a tightrope and you could fall off and it will all be a disaster. But that’s what you have to do otherwise what you’re writing about, singing about, making films about, painting…it isn’t going to mean anything. It’s got to mean something to you first for it then to mean something to another…I think there’s a Leonard Cohen quote that says ‘anyone can show a scar, but it takes courage to show a pimple.’
That made me feel a lot better. Author Andrea Eames, who I interviewed for my own podcast nearly 10 years ago now, also said something similar in my interview with her, which I’ve borne in mind over the last few intense months of writing and in the queasy moments that followed pressing “send” on the draft:
I felt like I was free-falling…and I sort of feel like you have to feel like that when you're writing. If you don't feel terrified of what you're doing, it’s probably not very good. I think you sort of need to be uncomfortable and off your guard and vulnerable to write anything worthwhile.
I have to keep reminding myself that books are slippery things - they often won’t be what you thought or hoped they would be - and that no one will give me permission to write this book. Confidence is something I have to choose, and I also have to hold my nerve, every step of the way. What an education this is proving to be!
Best Friend Therapy: Transactional analysis therapy - another fascinating episode, which explored the role of our various internal voices and how we can find our way to a nurturing and calm adult way of seeing things.
Picking
I took advantage of a warm day when I wasn’t feeling too under the weather (I caught a cough off my sister - but it was not covid!) to tidy up the garden, dig in some compost and mulch with seaweed which Dad brought round. I picked some very healthy looking nettles which were growing wild in the garden, and a random carrot which I don’t remember planting! The celery and rainbow chard continue to produce well. I haven’t had to buy celery all year thanks to my amazing plants! The leaves are also a great substitute for parsley too (which hasn’t grown very well for me - maybe I don’t wear the trousers in this house after all! [that’s an old wives tale]).
Eating
We had lunch outside at the start of the week, for the first time since April, but it’s been freezing pretty much every day since! Typical mercurial spring weather!
I made some rather lovely nettle soup from the nettles (pictured) which had an almost broccoli taste, which was really delicious.
Other yummy things I’ve made over the past two weeks (not all of them photographed, alas!):
Emma Galloway’s dhal with roasted cauliflower on the side
A rather epic apple crumble
Lime and ginger loaf cake
Sweet potato mac and cheese (veganised, which I think I now prefer to the original!)
Curried pumpkin, lentil and cauliflower soup
Vegetable cashew noodle stir fry (not dissimilar to this, just without tofu)
Tofu and rice with satay sauce (also from Emma Galloway’s latest book)
Vegan pizzas (still loving the mushroom, green olive and basil pesto combo)
Deliciously Ella’s mushroom and walnut ragu
We also tucked into some of the vegan chocolate stash we brought back from the UK!
If you would like any of the recipes for the dishes above that I made up, including the nettle soup, do let me know and I will happily write them up…provided I wrote down what I did of course, haha!
Watching
We have seen quite a few films these past few weeks.
Three Thousand Years of Longing (at the cinema) - this was our anniversary treat, and as it was a rainy Thursday afternoon we (almost) had the entire cinema to ourselves. Anything with Tilda Swinton and Idris Elba in it is going to be good, am I right? This was just what I was in the mood for - a well-crafted and acted film with a big brain and surreal/fantastical elements. An accomplished, outwardly content but somewhat lonely scholar (Swinton) buys an artefact in an Istanbul bazaar while there on a conference (she is a narratologist). Back at her hotel room she cleans the artefact, and a Djinn (Elba) appears, offering her three wishes in exchange for his freedom. Anyone expecting a “adult version of Aladdin” as I saw the film referred to in some reviews might be disappointed. It’s actually a very intellectual (as well as visually stunning) exploration of what stories mean and what cultural functions they serve (as cautionary tales, to maintain the status quo, etc). It also examines the idea that unless love is given freely, it isn’t really love at all (in other words, you cannot wish for it). Visually arresting, ambitious in scope and very funny in places, it’s a wonderful film to escape into. I really loved it.
Jurassic World Dominion (4K Blu Ray) - Tommy’s choice, you’ll not be surprised to hear, haha! Getting the original cast back together for this film was the main attraction for me, as I imagine it was for many, and Jeff Goldblum delivers even the most mundane lines in his usual scene-stealing way. Especially when he says: “Jurassic World. Not a fan.” Hahaha! But overall, despite the dazzling animatronics and some genuinely terrifying moments, it wasn’t my favourite of the franchise. Good fun though!
The Flipside (DVD) - OMG, what a find this was. Tom had gone into JB Hifi to get Jurassic World and while I was waiting for him to find it, I spotted this. Reading the synopsis, I was immediately intrigued. An Australian film, set in Adelaide and the Barossa, with all the ingredients of a Phil film - comedy, romance, food and wine, road trips, missed chances, the complicated emotional lives of women. A no-brainer, frankly! The minute it started playing, I knew we were going to enjoy it. It was very charming, clever, well-acted and the right amount of quirky. It reminded me a lot of one of my all time favourite films, Sideways. And yes, we watched it while drinking a Barossan shiraz and a meal that included quite a few Maggie Beer products - I like to team the evening meal with the theme of our chosen film!
I’ve become a little obsessed with Marion Pilowsky’s (the director) back catalogue - she has a lot of very funny and clever short films available on Youtube. I really related to what Marion said about why she made The Flipside:
After working in London for many years I returned to my hometown of Adelaide to focus on writing and directing. In the beginning it really struck me how alien I felt after being away for so long. As I readjusted the vast differences in culture and mind-set between Europe and Australia, it gave me an idea for a story that I felt many could relate to - the visitors from hell. This is a film about finding your true home, love, sex, food and bloody good Shiraz, as well as being my own personal ode to Australia.
She’s pretty much described the sequel to The Latte Years (which may or may not be in the works)!
Honestly, nothing makes me happier than discovering a funny, well-written, truly enjoyable film - and the fact it was written and directed by an Australian woman is a wonderful bonus. From what I could tell it wasn’t particularly well reviewed and I can’t really understand why - I guess people just didn’t get it. But I got it wholeheartedly! I urge you, if you’re in Australia, to seek it out - I don’t think you’ll be disappointed. And Castle fans, you’ll spot a beloved actor from that film in this one and he uses profanity in exactly the same hilarious way. Let me know if you check it out!
Grateful for
Good health (well, the knowledge that a hacking cough is just that and it will pass). A loving husband and family. Friends who show they care. That I live somewhere safe and uncrowded, where the streets are so silent at night you would think you were the only person living there. A roof over my head, food on the table, clean water, a warm bed. The usual suspects!
As I think I’ve hinted at quite a bit in my This Week posts, 2022 has not been an easy year. But, in my stronger, more clear-headed moments, I like to think I have grown more resilient because of it, and I have also been shown that I have a choice where my energy goes. I cannot control how anyone else has chosen to behave but I can choose how much energy I give to things that are, at the end of the day, not actually about me at all. It’s so easy to get bogged down in dramas and doubts, but life is not a guarantee, it is a gift and should be lived with reverence for what matters most. “Be here now” is my most oft-repeated mantra in meditation and it does help ground me. I am truly grateful for all the moments of enlightenment, in whatever form they’ve come, that have led to greater awareness and resilience.
Quote of the week
“We are what we believe we are.” - C.S Lewis
If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! I hope you’re all keeping safe and well xx