this week, and the ones before

Hello friends! This will be quite the catch-up post, as last week’s was, so do get a cup of tea and make yourself comfortable.

I can’t believe it’s December and in a matter of weeks, another year will be over. I don’t think I’m alone in eagerly anticipating the fresh start that the first of January promises (but admittedly doesn’t always deliver) as this year has been harder than most. I am ending it a different person than I was at its beginning. I think I’m tougher, wiser, more resilient, and less afraid and naive. Those are very good things and I’m grateful for the hard-won lessons, but I’m still looking forward to seeing 2022 in the rearview mirror nonetheless!

This post is going to be a mash-up of the highlights of the past few weeks since we returned from Melbourne, and then on Friday we’ll be back to regularly scheduled programming….she says hopefully.

Favourite experience/s

Probably this amazing news, sharing it and celebrating it with some delicious Bream Creek vintage sparkling wine, as pictured above! This year I’ve really tried to push myself with my writing, put myself out there and really back myself. This has been incredibly hard to do at times, in the face of everything that Tom and I have had to deal with this year. But I also did not want another year lost to imposter syndrome, where I believed my critics (both inner and outer) over the quiet but fierce inner wisdom, encouragement and truth in my own heart. Perhaps I needed reminding that I’m on the right path. To have achieved this incredible feat, and several others, in spite of everything has been so wonderful, so needed and so encouraging.

I’ve also enjoyed hanging out with my nieces and nephews - one I took to a kids session at Frida’s Sip and Paint where we painted this Eastern Rosella together:

And I also enjoyed getting a much-needed haircut!

Reading

To be honest, I’ve been writing more than I’ve been reading - which is probably a good thing. I had a fantastic workshop with my fellow Creative Writing PhDs last Friday, so spent some time reading their work and prepping for that.

I’ve been rereading an old favourite, Tina Fey’s Bossypants, which is still great fun and I enjoyed noticing its subtle influence on The Latte Years, as I originally read it around the same time. It was such an inspiration for me in how to write about the harder, darker things with humour. I’m enjoying revisiting it, especially as we’re now rewatching 30 Rock, probably the greatest TV show ever made.

For our last Hidden Nerve session, Nigel read us a poem by Claire G. Coleman, “Forever, Flag”, which I saved to read again later - it’s quite astonishing and powerful.

Sophie Cunningham was another Hidden Nerve presenter and I borrowed her book Melbourne from the library as I’m very interested in the work she’s done in the psychogeographic space. Loving it so far!

I’m nearly finished with Olivia Yallop’s Break the Internet, which I’ve enjoyed more and more the deeper I’ve got into it, and am now into Johann Hari’s Stolen Focus, recommended to me by many readers and friends. I’m coming up to almost a year since I spontaneously decided to step away from social media. I’m now managing an Instagram account for a client, so I’m just using theirs, not my personal one which I haven’t even glanced at. But it was interesting to observe in myself the familiar itch that resurfaced almost immediately - the itch to check, scroll, see. It is very helpful to just be using it for work and have a hard boundary. Johann Hari’s book is making the excellent point that the problem with attention, focus and our ability to think deeply goes beyond social media and into the Internet itself and all its trappings - email, smartphones, screens.

I will write more in depth about this in due course but having been off social media (with my personal accounts at least) for nearly a year now, I can say with absolute certainty that it’s done something to my brain. I have my brain back, perhaps. I am a more productive (dare I say a better?) writer without it. I have achieved more and feel more balanced without it. I have observed that I still seek (and desire) external validation at times and feel a bit sad/deprived when I don’t get it, but it is so much easier to spot when I’m in that frame of mind now, rather than it simply being my default position because I felt constantly in a state of comparison with others. It’s been a very, very interesting experiment.

Listening to

I discovered the Stella Anning Trio while we were in Melbourne - I love gentle jazz and their album Stat is a wonderful moody soundtrack when sipping your herbal tea (or something stronger) in the hour or so before bed.

How to Fail: Rob Delaney on the death of his beloved son Henry - listen to this if you need a good cry but also to marvel at how bloody resilient people can be in the face of the unthinkable.

Best Friend Therapy: is back for another season, so every Monday when I walk to or from uni I have a new episode, hooray! This week’s episode on how to work with friends was very relevant and gave me a lot to think about.

The First Time: Masters Series with Heather Rose - her new book is on my Christmas Wishlist!

Writes 4 Women: Writing the Second Novel with Holly Ringland - yay Holly! Loved this candid and inspiring interview with a wonderful writer who happens to be a friend too.

Mummafication: Another interview with a good friend of mine, this time parent educator Katie Parker which had me grinning with pride as I listened. Relevant even if you’re not a parent, FYI.

Happy Place: Dawn O’Porter and Tim Minchin - enjoyed both but I especially liked Tim’s, as he really delved into the harder parts of the creative life, and convincing yourself that you are worthy even when you aren’t getting attention. He is so unapologetically himself but it has taken quite a while to get to such a comfortable place. Worth a listen!

You and Me Both with Hilary Clinton: Hilary interviews Hannah Gadsby - loved it. I especially enjoyed hearing them talk about Tasmania (Hilary has apparently never been) and nodding furiously along as Hannah described how Tassie used to be and how it’s changed for the better. I am proud that Tasmania now has some of the strongest human rights protection laws in the country, quite a contrast to how things used to be for the queer community. Hannah is always a delight to listen to and the banter with Hilary is just wonderful.

Eating

As usual, there’s quite a bit to catch you up on here - I’ve made and eaten some very delicious things!

When it was very warm a few weeks ago (the promise of summer that promptly vanished within 48 hours and was replaced with a fortnight of rain and 3 degree nights!), I made this incredible Bún Chả Giò Chay (Vietnamese rice noodle bowl with spring rolls) and I want you to try it so much I wrote out the recipe! It’s the perfect dinner on a hot day.

I highly recommend getting the Fix and Fogg Smoke and Fire Peanut Butter for the sauce if you can find it. Not only was it magnificent in the noodles, I have also had some with avocado on toast which was quite sensational. A must for the chilli lovers. If you’re not in Oz or NZ, looks like the folks at Fix and Fogg ship worldwide! (and their recipe section is pretty epic and everything sounds amazing!)

We had a friend round for dinner and I made a new recipe from a favourite cookbook The Green Roasting Tin - the crispy gnocchi with mushrooms, squash and sage (p.68). I didn’t make the basil dressing but instead thinned down a bought vegan pesto with lemon juice and olive oil, which worked just as well. It was so very delicious! I have bought more gnocchi this week with the intention of making it again.

My new favourite bought dip is the signature Tahini Neri - a friend served it to me in Melbourne and I was delighted to find it in my local Hill Street Grocer when I got home (we often don’t get everything the mainland gets!). It’s so unctuous and savoury. Almost better than hummus, but not quite.

Speaking of hummus, I finally made hummus with dried chickpeas rather than tinned. I know, how can I possibly call myself a foodie? Every cookery writer I love and revere has waxed lyrical over the years of the incredible difference it makes using dried chickpeas to make hummus but being lazy and short on time I had never bothered. That will never happen again. I am here to tell you that the rumours are true. DRIED CHICKPEAS FOR THE WIN.

It was the best hummus I have ever had. The Tom of hummus, you could say! 😉

I used the OTK cookbook recipe which had very detailed instructions which included adding ice cubes to the food processor. I used an organic Woolworth’s tahini. It was simply magnificent. I will always make it this way from now on and urge you, if you are hummus lover, to set aside some time and make it with dried chickpeas. It will change your life!

I soaked a whole packet of dried chickpeas because, in addition to hummus, I also made felafel from scratch for the first time that week. I made the spicy felafel recipe in Deliciously Ella’s Quick and Easy. While they were absolutely scrumptious, I am not a fan of frying things in oil - mostly because the house stinks afterwards. They were absolutely worth the effort, almost as good as Pilpel’s in London, but I might try them in the air fryer or oven next time.

By the way, chickpeas start to stink when they’re soaking! I didn’t know this and freaked out, worried that they’d gone off because it was quite hot that week. Don’t panic, apparently it’s normal. I had them at room temperature for the first two days but then put them in the fridge until I was ready to make the recipes. All was well, everything was delicious and both Tom and I are still alive, with perfectly working digestive systems!

We ate in restaurants every day while we were in Melbourne, which was wonderful but it’s definitely more a treat than a regular thing for us. I’m keen to see what delights Hobart has to offer us this summer, as we definitely curtailed our eating out once the borders opened this time last year. A firm favourite so far is The Salty Dog on Kingston Beach, where we had a delicious lunch a few weeks ago. We had tempura cauliflower, enoki mushroom and black rice bowls (and a side of chips), sitting in the sun with cold beers while the salty ocean air drifted towards us on the light breeze. Heavenly!

I don’t make sweet breakfasts very often but we had some leftover porridge from Friday’s breakfast, so that Sunday I made leftover porridge pancakes, which I served with coconut yoghurt, maple syrup and slices of fresh pear. Yum!

My oven runs very hot - I should have taken this out five minutes earlier….still delicious though!

I bought Celebrate: Plant-Based Recipes for Every Occasion while we were in Melbourne, and have already made the summer greens filo pie twice (the benefits of having spinach and silverbeet going wild in the garden). It’s absolutely delicious! The first time I made it as written, the second time I left the broccoli whole and upped the spices a little more. I think it will be a staple for us over the summer now we have so many greens that need using and eating!

Now that it’s warming up, our favourite meal of last summer, the Nacho Average Nachos from Charity Morgan’s amazing book Unbelievably Vegan, is back on the menu. Regular readers will be familiar with these by now! Always amazing.

I helped Dad prune his broad beans and he gave me some - mine are still a month or so away from being ready - which I cooked separately, skinned and then cooked with cavolo nero, lemon zest, garlic, chilli and herbs, which we enjoyed with spaghetti, topped with toasted breadcrumbs.

Finally, I started road-testing some recipes for my Christmas baking and came up with these incredible vegan Oreo brownies. I’ve already published the recipe, that’s how good they are! Seriously, if you love a good brownie, you need these in your life. With a batch or two of these and Nigella’s vegan gingerbread, that’s my festive season sorted!

Picking

The garden was overgrown with greens - rainbow chard, silverbeet, spinach, celery and garlic scapes - when we returned from Melbourne. I’ve now given it a major haircut so the sun might actually reach the poor zucchini seedlings.

I’ve also made a tower out of discarded motorcycle tyres (thanks to a local dealership who let me help myself) to grow potatoes in, and the first green shoots are starting to poke through. I read a book over the winter that suggested growing potatoes this way can yield a harvest of up to 50kg….we shall see!

I also picked the rhubarb (which I have growing in a tub) and I made a yummy crumble from that. The major crop of strawberries are starting to redden and we’ve had to put cages on top of the troughs again to keep the greedy birds away. They get their revenge by throwing dirt out of other pots, ignoring the strawberries I have deliberately left unprotected for them to help themselves to! 😜

I’m not sure how abundant this summer will be, as I didn’t have the most productive spring in the garden, due to illness and constant work! But I am hopeful. Time will tell.

Drinking

Tom, our brother-in-law and my dad have started their own brewing company and their first limited release dropped last week. It’s a really delicious, complex and refreshing pale ale, perfect for a blazing hot afternoon like the ones we’ve enjoyed this weekend! I’m very proud of the three of them for taking something that was just an idea thrown around at a family gathering a year or two ago and making it a reality! Our company designed the labels and logo too.

After we got home from Melbourne, I cleaned out the fridge and found some kombuchas I made in January…2021! I made them with a SCOBY kindly given to me by Sarah (sadly the SCOBY has long since been composted due to my neglect!). The incredible pop when I opened them was quite ferocious, as they’d been sealed and fermenting for the best part of two years. Thinking they would be undrinkable, I poured a little of each into a shot glass, sniffed and sipped - and they’re OK! Quite strong, as you’d expect, but I’ve been enjoying them in a large wine glass where I put a splash of kombucha in the bottom and then top it up with plain sparkling water. Not unlike how you’d prepare a cordial. The elderflower and ginger one has matured particularly well.

Watching

At Tom’s insistence, we watched Monty Python’s Holy Grail and Life of Brian on BluRay, which I hadn’t seen for many years, probably not since I was a teenager (and hadn’t liked them that much). This time I really got the humour - most likely a side effect from being with Tom for 15 years, haha!

We have just completed a watch of the entire series of the US version of The Office which we absolutely loved. I read an interview with Jenna Fischer who said that the fact that the “documentary” wrapped up when Pam was ready to leave Dunder Mifflin, as opposed to any other characters who came and went in the course of the series, was not lost on her. I agree, I think on this rewatch I realised that Pam is very much the central character of the show, rather than Michael Scott, as it very much follows her journey.

We’re now working our way through probably our favourite TV show of all, 30 Rock, which we’ve not watched properly for nearly two years. It’s smart, charming, well-constructed and absolutely hilarious.

Wearing

The weather has been pretty mercurial so I’ve been wearing my denim jacket (which I bought from Sainsbury’s in 2014!) almost every day. It goes well with dresses or my favourite skirts from Kemi Telford. I’ve also been loving my new strap detail cross body bag from Country Road - I was fed up to the back teeth with my giant tote where I can never find anything so treated myself while we were in Melbourne. This is a surprisingly roomy and very stylish little bag which is not a headache to lug around, in fact I barely notice it’s there. I wish I’d downsized ages ago!

Grateful for

My husband and family. Good friends. The weather finally warming up and the colds we’ve had finally being on the run.

Quote of the week

This poem by John O’Donohue was mentioned a few weeks ago in an email newsletter I subscribe to, which sounded familiar. Then I noticed in the “on this day” feature that OneDrive has that I had taken a screenshot of the poem on that same day two or three years ago. A coincidence? Maybe. But the message of the poem was obviously fitting for the time and it is certainly fitting now! If you need to hear it, may it comfort you as it has comforted me these past few weeks.

This is the time to be slow

This is the time to be slow
Lie low to the wall
Until the bitter weather passes

Try, as best you can, not to let
The wire brush of doubt
Scrape from your heart
All sense of yourself
And your hesitant light.

If you remain generous,
Time will come good;
And you will find your feet
Again on fresh pastures of promise,
Where the air will be kind
And blushed with beginning.

- John O’Donohue, from From To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings. Penguin Random House, 2008.

I am hoping, so hoping, that the air of 2023 will be kind and blushed with beginning. For all of us.

If you’d like to share your thoughts on anything in this post, or anything else, with me, then please do! I really enjoy hearing from you. I hope you’re also finding things to enjoy, savour and ponder over your weekend xx

Please note: this blog post has affiliate links with retailers such as Booktopia which means I may receive a commission for a sale that I refer, at no extra cost to you.

catching up

Dear friends, how have you been? It feels like ages since I last wrote a post - last week was simply too much of a whirlwind to even contemplate it. And now, it’s Friday yet again, and it will be November before we know it.

The last fortnight has held a lot of work, a lot of running around, a lot of a-ha moments, and a lot of signs that I have probably been working too hard and need to take it easy. Therapy has shown me that busy-ness and work, much as I enjoy it, is also how I distract myself and keep at bay things I might not want to talk about or am not ready to process yet. It’s been that kind of year, and I’m sure it will continue that way until it’s out. Such is the way of things, I’ve learned.

As always I find my anchoring in writing, in music, in reading, in meditation, in nature and in the company of the people I love most. How deeply grateful I am to have all those things.

The main event is that we had a joyful celebration of Tom’s birthday, which was quite a change from his last two birthdays - in 2020 we could only have a limited number of people to the house, and last year we were completely locked down (an introvert’s dream birthday, you could say). So that’s leading on nicely to…

Favourite experience/s of the week

A quiet but fun-filled day celebrating Tom, where we did all his favourite things and had lovely visits and Facetimes with family and friends. We shared a cake with our niece and nephew who are heart-burstingly adorable. And we had a wonderful trip to Gold Class where we saw a great film, had champagne brought to us, and felt very spoiled indeed. You only turn 42 once, after all, and I’m glad my darling Tommy got to do it in style.

I also attended my friend Holly’s book event in Hobart - despite getting caught in a biblical downpour on the way there and therefore looking like I’d been for a swim in my clothes when I arrived, it was a wonderful, memorable and inspiring evening as expected!

Reading

I finished Lucy Caldwell’s excellent short story collection Intimacies - about young women trying to find their place in the world, navigating emigration, motherhood, nostalgia, loss, temptation. I really enjoyed it. It also inspired me to trawl through my hard drives and find short stories I wrote during my London years that I never quite finished, on very similar themes. I discovered Lucy Caldwell quite by accident and I’m so glad I did! She’s a great writer, deserving of as much praise as Sally Rooney, in my opinion.

I’m dipping in and out of Break the Internet by Olivia Yallop which is basically a deep dive into the world of influencers and the industry that has built up around them, particularly over the last seven or so years. I’m finding it both infuriating and fascinating! The internet, and the world, was a very different place when I started blogging in 2005. Back then it was hard to imagine anyone wanting to watch a video of someone unboxing something, let alone that you might get famous, amass millions of followers and a veritable fortune for doing so. Some children I used to babysit (who are now, naturally, in their twenties!) have done just that, which boggles my mind. It’s an interesting experience to read this book as someone who didn’t exactly have a non-existent online profile themselves back in the day, and to be torn between feeling like I dodged a bullet or missed the boat. On balance I think it was the former. Either way it’s a great read and showcases what a disturbing landscape has been created in terms of why and how people get famous these days. A perfect companion/antidote would be So You’ve Been Publicly Shamed by Jon Ronson, an excellent book I read a few years ago, which hammers home the very dark side of “going viral”.

Rereading Natalie Goldberg’s The True Secret of Writing - I started reading The Body Keeps the Score but found that a bit heavy for bedtime reading, so switched to something that would get me in my happy place! Natalie’s words always make me want to write. I should also reread Dani Shapiro’s Still Writing, one of my favourite books on the creative life.

I also finished reading a wonderful biography of Gwen Harwood and writing a review of it, which I’ll hopefully be able to share in a few weeks.

Creative Boom: Beat the industry’s seven deadly sins with these brilliant books - I want to read all of these!

Catapult: Trying to escape the trap of digital productivity by Richa Kaul Padte - oh boy, how I related to this! My own stepping away from social media at the start of the year was a spontaneous decision but in the nearly 10 months that have elapsed since then, I can see it was something that had been brewing in my subconscious for a very long time. Padte makes some really interesting points about social media turning your life into a performance even when you are consciously trying to subvert that idea:

Even when I am not posting a picture, when I have ideologically committed to not posting it, I am still producing it in my mind’s eye. This compulsive documentation of my surroundings isn’t for personal use; instead, it is vertically shot and artfully arranged for a grid I can’t seem to escape. It’s what the environmentalist Vandana Shiva terms elsewhere a “colonization of the mind,” which feels, in the digital era, inextricably linked with the logic of productivity.

To be honest, I can’t believe it’s been nearly a year. I deactivated Facebook quite some time before this year’s complete exodus, so it’s been even longer since I was on there in many meaningful way. It has profoundly changed my life and outlook. I have so much to say about it and I’ll do another update for you all soon. Thank you Richa Kaul Padte for throwing a log on my internal fire!

I finished Jarvis Cocker’s Good Pop Bad Pop which was as wonderful as I had anticipated. I wonder about doing a project of my own along similar lines - I have boxes and boxes of detritus from my childhood and early adulthood that my parents stored for me while I lived in the UK, and now naturally boxes of ephemera from my life in the UK too. Jarvis ponders in his book, as he is faced with an unwieldy pile of mess in his loft - why do we save things? Why do we collect things? What do these random piles of stuff we amass in the course of our lives and keep hidden away say about us and what we value? What sort of story do they tell about us and our lives? These are fascinating questions and I very much enjoyed Jarvis’s attempts to answer them.

And finally, I am listening to Toni Morrison’s Beloved on audiobook, read by the author herself, as I finish an embroidery project. It’s blowing my mind. Our Hidden Nerve session on Thursday (I can’t quite believe we only have one more to go) featured a few passages from it as an illustration of the presenter’s point about use of metaphor, how to create sensuousness in your writing without being obvious, and also how to write about anger. It was a really big penny-drop moment for me and I think it deserves a post all of its own, so stay tuned for that.

Listening to

On my morning runs, I’ve been doing something different and listening to affirmations over house music. Elroy Spoonface Powell (Chakra Blue) is my favourite. It’s a great change, and particularly good on days I feel a bit slow and lethargic. Running is a great mood lifter anyway but with these affirmations in my AirPods, it’s a complete endorphin-filled experience! Highly recommended. You can listen to Chakra Blue on Tidal (as I do) or Spotify.

Happy Place: The Craig David episode was brilliant. If you’re a recovering people pleaser, this will resonate.

Chill and Prosper with Denise Duffield-Thomas: I don’t know how this landed in my feed but I’m glad I discovered it. I listened to the episode where Denise talks about how to fix undercharging and overdelivering in business and I had quite a few a-ha moments! Worth a listen for all you freelancers out there!

I have recently made a playlist of favourite classical tracks and have recently rediscovered Brahms’ Serenades which were a favourite of mine as a teenager, which I played non-stop (but quietly) when I sat up late writing by candlelight like Jo March in Little Women. I love how music instantly transports you back to the time you associate with it, I could practically see my school bag in the corner.

Eating

I made Deliciously Ella’s spiced cauliflower and cashew pilaf traybake again (pictured) which was even nicer than the first time - probably because I added some chilli powder, haha! It’s a really easy and delicious meal, I thoroughly recommend trying it out.

An Italian-flavoured two lentil soup which I made a vat of - took a container round to my sister who has a newborn and an almost-three-year-old, and then we enjoyed the rest both as a soup with bread and then as a pasta sauce the next day when it had thickened overnight. Love a meal that does double duty!

Vegan chocolate cake for Tom’s birthday - which our niece pronounced “delicious”! - and vegan banana bread, just for something extra!

I made a rather divine creamy broccoli pasta with capers and aged cashew cheese, which we both loved. I think there was a sweet potato mac and cheese in there too.

Now I’m trying to meal plan for the next week and this is what I have in mind:

• Quinoa pad thai (a Rachel Ama recipe, from her second and latest book)

• Fennel and butter bean stew

• Veggie burgers

• Some sort of curry, most likely an Indian flavoured one because I bought a rather addictive mango pickle from Namaste Spices in Moonah and am glad of any excuse to eat it

• Chickpea and sausage casserole

• Most likely a pasta as well, which Tom has said on many occasions he could happily eat every day!

That’s all I’ve got so far! What’s on your meal plan?

Watching

Tom and I went to see Amsterdam for his birthday outing and we LOVED it. Never, ever believe the online reviews. I’m glad we didn’t! It’s quite something when a film set nearly 90 years ago manages to say a great deal about the present day.

Amsterdam is a complex murder mystery that unfolds alongside a poignant tale of love and friendship between three people who met and bonded on the battlefields of the First World War. Despite the horrors they witnessed and endured at the Front, Burt (Christian Bale), Harold (John David Washington) and Valerie (Margot Robbie) spend a happy period of living it up in post-war Amsterdam, and all return to America feeling hopeful and optimistic about the future. Nearly 15 years later, the three are drawn back together when their old army colonel dies suddenly. His daughter (Taylor Swift) believes he has been murdered and asks Burt and Harold, who have stayed in touch all this time and are still best friends, to investigate on the quiet. Unfortunately, the daughter’s hunch is correct and she too is bumped off before Burt and Harold can confirm her suspicions. There is then an extensive flashback to their time in the army and in Amsterdam, which give the viewer many clues as to how they’ve ended up in this situation. Back in 1930s New York, they find themselves unexpectedly reunited with Valerie and the three join forces once again to unearth the culprit and to also expose some dangerous right-wing underground activities that are brewing, some of which involve a few people they know.

Written and directed by David O.Russell, Amsterdam is a very clever and well-produced film full of dark humour but with also some very serious messages about the world we live in today: the prejudices that are still alive and well; how needless suffering is allowed to happen; how tolerance of dangerous rhetoric can have terrible consequences (the theme of turning a blind eye was brilliantly symbolised with the use of eyes in Valerie’s artwork and in Burt’s glass eye); the futility of war and greed; and that choosing love over hate is vital but not enough on its own. We also have to fight to protect kindness, which is usually the first casualty of power being pursued at all costs. “I’m very happy to be unimportant and live in a place that has love and beauty,” muses Valerie. “Art and love, that’s what makes life worth living.”

I have spent much of the last six years despairing over the state of politics in the Western world, as I imagine many of you have too. Living in the UK as Brexit rumbled and the Tories stripped the country’s integrity away piece by piece; sharing my American friends’ horror, grief and fear as Trump was voted in; too numb to cry as I watched the Australian election results in 2019 and we learned Morrison was staying where he was for the foreseeable. In each situation, I always wondered HOW?! How has this been allowed to happen?! I am no political scientist but I am a historian. And the great lesson of history is that people and nations rarely learn from it. Watching this film, two years on from the ousting of Trump, was a curious thing. I have listened to many podcasts and read many articles about the situation and conditions that were created in America that allowed him to rise to power in the first place, but it never crystallised more for me than in the watching of Amsterdam. All the clues are there, if you want to see them. It’s not about the 1930s, or the aftermath of the First World War. It’s about the world we have lived in for the past few decades, and where it all came from.

Honestly, I cannot recommend it enough. As does the birthday boy, who said “if they were releasing it on 4K Blu-Ray tomorrow, we’d be watching again tomorrow. I can’t wait to see it again!”

Wearing

I haven’t worn them yet but I finally bit the bullet and bought myself two pairs of new running tights, as the ones I bought in 2019 are starting to get holes in them! In fact most of my running gear is very old - I still have the Sweaty Betty capris I ran the London Marathon in (which also have holes, so I use those for gardening), Lorna Jane gear I’ve had since 2013, yoga pants I bought in Canada in 2007 (!), the list goes on. It’s all lasted pretty well considering how I practically live in workout gear. My friend Anita recommended Australian brand Abi + Joseph to me ages ago and this week they had a 70% off sale, so I was out of excuses! I’m excited to run in tights that have a pocket for my phone, instead of using my spi-belt that has never sat on my hips properly or wearing a jacket with zipped pockets, which just gets too hot this time of year. Will report back.

Quote of the week

Holly quoted this short poem by Mary Oliver at her event last Friday evening, and I’ve been thinking about it ever since. I think it sums up the human experience in general!

“We shake with joy, we shake with grief. What a time they have, these two housed as they are in the same body.” - Mary Oliver

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! Have a happy and safe weekend xx

this week

Spring has come to Battery Point…

Another week has passed, a week in which I was braced for turbulence that never eventuated. Today I feel oddly fragile, like a bird with a sore wing. Nothing’s broken, maybe I’ve just flown into a window.

I’m writing this with the front door open (even though it’s cloudy in Hobart today it’s still warm) and a steaming cup of Bengal Spice tea on my desk, the smell of jasmine, lilac and wattle in the air, and the crow of the neighbourhood rooster echoing in the street.

Getting grounded, taking a moment to be here, now, in the moment - it always helps.

Favourite experience/s of the week

Lots of little moments of joy. Finishing a journal and starting a new one. A beautiful card and letter from a friend on the mainland. Two lovely morning runs with the smell of crushed gumnuts underfoot, a clear view of the mountain, a still river and wallabies watching me from the long grass. Another friend’s new book arriving, lying in bed with it, turning pages until well after midnight.

Reading

My friend Holly’s new book The Seven Skins of Esther Wilding - I’m trying my best to savour it and not succeeding, she’s written another page turner! I’ll say more once I’ve finished it but needless to say it’s sumptuous, sensory and poignant writing, as always, and I’m enjoying it very much.

My Tongue is My Own: A Life of Gwen Harwood by Ann-Marie Priest - I’m reading this to review for an academic journal and absolutely loving it. Thoroughly researched, lively and utterly riveting, I’m loving getting to know Gwen Harwood and the fascinating life she lived. Any good biography of a poet should send the engaged reader straight to the work and that’s exactly what this book has done for me - I’m now reading Harwood’s poetry alongside the biography, which is proving to be a fun, if slightly mind bending, experience!

Everything Feels Like The End of the World by Else Fitzgerald - I’ve started dipping into this short story collection which is described as “short speculative fiction exploring possible futures in an Australia not so different to our present day to one thousands of years into an unrecognisable future.” Certainly what I’ve read so far has felt very prescient! Full of fiery, flooding imagery, cities becoming unliveable. As I dipped into this earlier in the week we were told to brace ourselves for severe weather which ended up not reaching us down here…yet. Towns on the mainland already torn apart by flooding needing to prepare for more, and worse. So reading Fitzgerald’s stories felt odd alongside this, and everything else that has happened - it’s speculative but also very, very real. In many ways it almost reads like nostalgia for the world we live in now, because on some level we know it’s already been lost. Lots to ponder here.

GQ Magazine: 14 hours in the queue to see Queen Elizabeth’s coffin by Laurie Penny - would I have queued to see the Queen lying in state if I still lived in London? I really didn’t know, especially after reading this!

Paul Graham: Maker’s Schedule, Manager’s Schedule - an article from 2009 but still deeply relevant and relatable. It made me feel very seen. A must read for creatives!

Listening to

We Can Do Hard Things with Glenn Doyle: Hannah Gadsby, How to Communicate Better - always a pleasure to listen to Hannah who, as the whole world knows, is a very funny and deeply intelligent person.

How to Fail: Melanie Chisholm on mental health, self-worth and the Spice Girls - loved this revealing, tender and lively interview with Melanie, who comes across as someone very grounded and self-aware. I related to so much of what she had to say. Highly recommended!

Doing it Right with Pandora Sykes: a new to me podcast which I’m impressed with so far - her conversation with environmentalist and slow fashion advocate Venetia La Manna (one of my favourite Youtubers) was fantastic. Two articulate, passionate and well-informed women having an important conversation - it ticked all my boxes!

I’ve had Beethoven’s Pastoral symphony (his 6th symphony) playing while writing and working this week - in My Tongue is My Own, there is a lovely description of new mother Gwen in 1946 bringing her baby home from the hospital, back to their Fern Tree cottage, on the road to Hobart’s mountain kunanyi/Mt Wellington. She and her husband had just got a radio and Beethoven’s Pastoral was what came on as Gwen walked out on to the balcony, baby in her arms, as the snow began to fall. '“It was too much: that marvellous Movement…the snow falling, the great tall gum trees and to hold my own child. Every time I hear that great flowing theme, I am back there with the child, in the snow.” (88).

Eating

My favourite spinach, risoni and lemon soup - with loads of dill! Absolutely delicious as always.

Our favourite brunch, the Full Vegan, was enjoyed after a big 10km walk on the weekend. I haven’t seen our favourite sausages in the shops for a while but we make do with the hash browns, avocado, mushrooms and beans!

We had a Sunday roast with some wellingtons I’d made from the vegan sausage roll mixture and frozen the weekend before. After a bedtime flick through Nigel Slater’s Kitchen Diaries, I was craving roast potatoes, crispy and golden, their edges made translucent with (vegan) butter. Utterly delicious!

We also had the usual tofu noodle stir fry, dhal from the freezer, and more mind-blowing nachos which are such a treat. I also made a broccoli pasta with miso, vegan cream and capers which was quite sensational.

Watching

We finished The Newsreader on ABC iview which was absolutely wonderful - I cannot recommend it more highly. Smart writing, great acting and an utterly compelling story. If you loved Morning Wars (The Morning Show), I think this is even better.

I caught up with a few of my favourite Youtubers while also catching up on my sewing - I’m making a gift for a friend who I’m going to see in a few weeks so wanted to get that almost finished. I really enjoy sewing while catching up with Katie, Miranda, Venetia, Helen and Phoebe. In Katie’s case, I do know her - we met at an Arvon Foundation event well over ten years ago now and stayed in intermittent touch for a few years. I didn’t realise she had a Youtube channel, and so watching a few episodes on her channel I felt like I’d spent the afternoon sewing and catching up with an old friend, which was really nice! Who are your favourites? Anyone I should be checking out?

Grateful for

Tom. Every time I am lost, he is the map that helps me get home.

Quote of the week

Not attributed to anyone in particular, just something I wrote in the last pages of the journal book I’ve just finished that felt pertinent this week. I think I read somewhere that everything that happens to you, you have a choice - whether you let it open you up, or close you down. This is my reminder to stay open. May it be yours too, if you need it.

Be open, not closed.

If you’d like to share your thoughts on this post, or anything else, with me, please do! Have a happy weekend and I’ll see you next week xx

my favourite reads of 2018

Books should always be accompanied by tea and homemade cake where possible.

In true Phil tradition, I wait until it is quite embarrassing to have a blog post with “2018” in the title to divulge my favourite reads of the last year. Also in my usual style, some of the best books were discovered and read in the final days of December, hence the long mulling over. But now I have decided and I hope you will enjoy hearing about my choices and maybe even be inspired to read them yourself. As always, I’d love to hear what your favourite reads of last year were too.

The Lost Flowers of Alice Hart by Holly Ringland

Full disclosure, Holly is a friend and I had been eagerly anticipating this book for years but I bought my own copy (which is the best way to support a friend who publishes a book! Buy it! Buy two! I speak from experience here) and was under no obligation to say nice things about it in public. But that is neither here nor there because I have nothing but nice things to say about it!

Lost Flowers is a read you won't forget in a hurry. Exquisitely written, this is a compelling story of grief, heartbreak, love, magic, wonder and redemption, with Australia's beautiful landscapes (bush, sea and desert) as the backdrop. Despite very dark subject matter, Holly has crafted a truly beautiful story that reads almost like a fairytale and brings it alive with luscious detail, particularly when it comes to Australia's native flowers, the vehicle through which young Alice Hart learns to communicate again after a violent family tragedy. 

But flowers can only say so much and the book's ultimate, powerful message is that, no matter how hard you try, you cannot run away from grief, from pain and from your past because it will always find you. There are some very dark times for Alice as she ignores danger signals time and time again - which is so unsettling as a reader, because you end up caring so much about her! - but Alice's story is, in the end, a hopeful one as she realises that facing pain and owning your story is the only way to move forward and claim your rightful place in the world. 

Books don't often move me in the way this one did. The storytelling is truly spectacular and the character of Alice Hart is the lost, frightened child seeking love and belonging that I think speaks to that part of all of us. Holly is a magical writer and I'd say this book is destined to become something of an Australian classic.

Someone At A Distance by Dorothy Whipple

I mentioned this book in my post about my love affair with Persephone Books which was well and truly rekindled in 2018. Someone At A Distance has probably been my favourite Persephone so far, and that is saying something, because they are yet to publish something I don’t enjoy!

Described as "a fairly ordinary tale about the destruction of a happy marriage", I was quite unprepared for how compelling and absorbing this tale would be. It's a novel all about relationships, how they form and also how they fall apart. Sometimes all it can take is 'someone at a distance' for that to happen. The novel follows what happens to this family when the husband/father is unfaithful, and the emotional devastation that has on everyone - there’s no great twist, per se, but the book’s genius and charm lies in how it explores the emotional lives of the characters, and how compassionately Whipple manages to do this. And I think Louise (the other woman) is by far the most repugnant character I’ve ever come across in literature. Dorothy Whipple was an extraordinary writer and I now want to read everything she ever wrote.

The Tuscan Cookbook by Stephanie Alexander and Maggie Beer

Stephanie’s Journal is one of my favourite books (it’s one of my mate Veggie Mama’s too!) - it is the diary Stephanie Alexander kept in the year 1997, which turned out to be a momentous one for her. She closed her famous restaurant in Melbourne, opened the Richmond Hill Cafe and Larder, and held three residential cooking schools in Tuscany with her friend Maggie Beer. I have read the journal countless times - at least once a year since I bought it off the sale table in Fullers Bookshop in 2001 sometime - but I had never read the cookbook that Stephanie and Maggie put out the year after the cooking schools, which naturally were full! Of course, it was published 20 years ago and it wasn’t easy to get a copy in the UK - but an Amazon secondhand seller came to rescue and I managed to get a copy that was signed by Stephanie herself! (I shall have to hope I run into Maggie sometime now that I’m back in Oz so she can sign it too!) It was such a treat to read this book after many years of imagining the cooking school, in the magical Tuscan countryside, and all the mouthwatering food they cooked. It has not only added to my enjoyment of one of my favourite books but it was a sumptuous read in its own right, with so many delicious recipes and ideas. So many recipes for cavolo nero, my favourite vegetable!

Home Cook by Thomasina Miers

I could not leave this book out of my favourites of the year, primarily because I cooked so much from it in 2018. Every recipe from this book that I’ve tried is an absolute winner. My favourite was the marmalade breakfast muffins, which I must have made every week for a couple of months, I just couldn’t get enough! When you’re an experienced cook it’s very rare when a book comes along that gives you new ideas and fresh energy to get into the kitchen and try some different things. Highly recommended!

The entire works of Diana Henry but particularly How To Eat A Peach and Food from Plenty

Diana Henry is fast becoming my favourite food writer. Her words are so evocative and poetic, you can practically smell what she’s cooking. This is a woman who loves food and has lived it. So many of the milestones in her life have a food story linked to it somehow, and I find this so interesting to read. Stories behind food and dishes, when they are told well, add greatly to my enjoyment of a recipe. I made quite a few dishes from How To Eat A Peach (which Tom got me for my birthday) over the long, hot summer we enjoyed in the UK last year and they were all excellent. It’s a lovely summery book, evidenced in the great variety of recipes for ice creams and sorbets (and such inventive combinations!). Perfect to sit with a cold glass of something indulgent and plan a dinner party with. Towards the end of the year, I noticed that nearly all Diana Henry’s books were 99p on Kindle for a few weeks, so I bought all of them (apart from the one entirely devoted to chicken, seeing I don’t eat it!). As with Thomasina Miers, it is rare for me to encounter a food writer that makes me want to actually cook their recipes as opposed to just soak up their exquisite prose.

Miss Buncle’s Book by D.E Stevenson

Also mentioned in my Persephone post and one of my favourites of theirs. Written in 1934 and hence reflecting the concerns of women at the time, without the financial security of marriage, Miss Barbara Buncle finds herself needing to supplement her already meagre income. She does what many people think will bring certain fame and fortune - write and publish a book! She writes a novel based on her village and all the people who live in it, thinking that changing names and writing it under a pseudonym will be sufficient to hide their true identities. To her huge surprise, her book (or John Smith’s book!) is a huge bestseller and her publisher wants a sequel, but lo and behold, all the villagers have read it, recognise themselves and their village immediately (which says it all, as some of it isn’t flattering!), are outraged and determined to find out who ‘John Smith’ is and make ‘him’ pay. No one suspects the dowdy and quiet Miss Buncle for a second, which is where all the hilarity ensues - but also makes an interesting observation that people often do have hidden lives and assumptions we make about others can so very often be wrong. It’s absorbing, intelligent and very charming.

84 Charing Cross Road / The Duchess of Bloomsbury Street by Helene Hanff

“I used to go to English movies just to look at the streets. I remember years ago a guy I knew told me that people going to England find exactly what they go looking for. I said I'd go looking for the England of English Literature, and he nodded and said: ‘It's there.’” Oh, this glorious book. What a treat. I’d wanted to read it for years - and on one sunny Sunday in September last year I read it, the whole thing (my edition included the sequel, The Duchess of Bloomsbury Street), and adored it. Do you ever read a book and as you’re reading it you know you’ve found a new favourite you’ll read again and again? That was this book for me. If you love London and books, I highly recommend it. It’s as charming and delightful as everyone says.

The Fortnight in September by R.C Sheriff

Also a Persephone book and an unusual one in that it was written by a man! But this was one of the most accomplished, most finely observed novels I have ever read. The premise is so simple - we follow the Stevens family on their annual two week holiday to the seaside in Bognor Regis. They are a typical middle-class 1930s family and have been going to the same B&B run by the same people for a very long time. Their holiday is as well-planned and thought out as their daily lives in South London, Mr Stevens has thought of everything down to the packing of the suitcases, the timings of the trains and which beach hut to hire for the best perspective. The B&B isn’t quite as comfortable as it used to be - slightly shabby, the landlady a little older and dottier - but the Stevens family do what they’ve always done and make the best of things. It’s an absolutely fascinating novel and so finely and accurately observed. Like I said, such a simple premise but the novel manages to capture all the big concerns of life within it - love, hope, disappointment, home, family, the passing of the years. I also loved how the very feeling of being on holiday is captured in this book - how the arrival at one’s destination is so anticipated and exciting, and then the days begin to roll by faster and faster and before you know it, the holiday is over and it’s time to go back home, to normal life. Wonderful. Simply wonderful.

Quartet in Autumn by Barbara Pym

I had been meaning to read this book for years and it felt poetic that I read it in November, during my last autumn in London. I seem to be enjoying novels that are more character studies, perhaps reflective of the direction my own writing is taking. In Quartet in Autumn, we meet four people who are colleagues sharing the same office - two men, two women, all of whom are nearing retirement age. The setting is London in the late 1970s and it’s an interesting study of loneliness and friendship, and how people’s inner and outer lives can be poles apart. Pym’s ability to write about the humdrum existences of these people without losing the reader at any point is quite incredible. I am studying her techniques intently! A writer of great tenderness and humour. I loved it.

One Day in December by Josie Silver

Instagram friends raving about this book + 99p on Kindle + 23 hours of flying from London to Melbourne = done deal! I wanted an absorbing, fun read for the London to Singapore leg of our journey home to Australia in December (ha!) and I got that and more with One Day in December. Wow. Good thing I was able to read the entire thing in one sitting because it is such a sweet, compelling and emotional story that I would have found it hard to put down otherwise.  I won't say anything about the plot - all I will say is that is it very, very rare for me to be moved to tears by a book. I cried a few times during the reading, but by the end I was a sobbing mess! Maybe it's because I was sleep deprived and emotional about returning home, who knows! But if you want a romantic and unputdownable holiday read that will really make you think about love, friendship, life and fate, I couldn't recommend this more highly.

The Empress of Australia: A Post War Memoir by Harry Leslie Smith

Harry Leslie Smith sadly passed away just as I was discovering his work late last year. I would highly recommend watching his speech at the Labour Party Conference in 2014. A man who lived through the depression of the 1930s, the Second World War and enormous social change throughout his lifetime, in his eighties and nineties Harry became a passionate political voice, speaking out about NHS cutbacks, benefits policy, political corruption, food poverty, the cost of education – and how the world his generation helped to build out of the rubble of depression, social inequality and the terror of war is slowly eroding. “Don’t let my past be your future,” he warned. This particular memoir was about life in Britain after he was demobbed from service in 1948 and attempted to make a life back in his hometown with his German wife. The attitude towards her was quite shocking (but I was also shocked to realise that it’s not dissimilar to attitudes towards immigrants and foreigners in modern day Britain! Very little has actually changed. Even the scene that takes place at peak hour in Paddington station when Harry and Friede are trying to get home from Gatwick was hauntingly similar to my experiences! But that’s a post for another day) and Harry’s valiant attempts to make a home for her are so noble and heartbreaking, but sadly it all unravels as Friede simply can’t adjust to the culture shock of post-war austerity Britain and Harry’s hopes of making a good life in working class Halifax fade rapidly. Eventually the story has a happy ending as they decide to emigrate to Canada on the ship from which this memoir derives its title. I read this as part of research for my novel, also set in 1948, and will refer to it often. What a brave, extraordinary man he was. I’m so glad he wrote his stories down.

Any Ordinary Day by Leigh Sales

One of the first books I borrowed from the library on landing in Hobart! In this book, journalist Leigh Sales interviews several people who have suffered or been involved in high-profile tragedies such as the Thredbo landslide and Port Arthur (I found that one the hardest to read) and how they coped with the trauma and attention that followed. After all, the days that these tragedies took place were just another ordinary day, to begin with. They woke up that morning having no idea by evening their lives would be forever altered. The interviews are powerful and honest. And alongside these very courageous testimonies is Leigh exploring the idea that none of us know when something will happen that changes everything. We have no ability to control these kinds of events happening to us, or our loved ones. We are all vulnerable. And if the worst does happen, what do you do then? Any Ordinary Day is such a compelling book about human capacity for resilience, courage, kindness and endurance. I wouldn’t recommend reading it before bed (!) but any other time you need to feel reminded of the resilience of human beings, the ability of communities to rally round and support each other, or just to feel nothing but unbridled gratitude for your life’s many blessings, this is a great read.

What books did you most enjoy reading in 2018?

PS: As I mention every year, any links to Amazon are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and end up making a purchase, I get a small commission. Many thanks for your support xx