Life

this week

GRATEFUL FOR

The world has felt very wonky and fragile these past few weeks (and years), so it goes without saying how grateful I am to be safe and healthy. But this week I was also especially grateful for a quiet place to work while I had a deadline, and a kind and understanding husband who made me lunch and brought me tea at regular intervals.

IN AWE OF

Nature. It’s the best reset button.

READING

Meanjin Quarterly: How writing can shred you

Sydney Review of Books: Ditching the New Yorker voice

Smokehouse by Melissa Manning, a magnificent collection of short stories set in a part of Tasmania not far from where I grew up.

An Onion in My Pocket: My Life with Vegetables by Deborah Madison. A dear friend bought me Madison’s Vegetable Literacy for my birthday many years ago and it’s one of my favourites - I didn’t know anything about her though, and now I do! Foodie memoirs are such a comfort genre for me, I find them really cosy and fun to dive into for bedtime or rainy day reading. I loved Madison’s exploration of her life through food, vegetarianism, Zen practice, travelling and working in restaurants. I particularly enjoyed her recounting of when she was basically the assistant to a fairly eccentric woman who lived on the east coast of the US - as I had met many similar characters on my own travels through that part of America, I could picture it all very clearly! I also loved her chapter on her most memorable meals, which I might have a go at writing about myself sometime.

LISTENING TO

Mary Lattimore’s Til A Mermaid Drags You Under - I’ve had this song on repeat all week, for writing, yoga, and meditation. It’s just exquisite.

Wild with Sarah Wilson: This is why you’re finding the world too much, with Johann Hari, Oliver Burkeman: 4,000 weeks, it’s all we’ve got in this lifetime, folks! and David Whyte: the insta-calm of poetry and asking beautiful questions. I love this podcast. I’m constantly in awe of Sarah Wilson’s passion, integrity and fierce intelligence. And her guests are pretty interesting too!

I wrote SO much this week and therefore cycled between all my writing playlists - I have four. A general one (heavily leaning on Einaudi, Frahm, Richter and Hutchings), a Morning Pages one, a “moody and dramatic” one (where I really want to stir up some big emotions, possibly even cry while writing) and a “writing beats” one which is chilled house and dance and more for editing or corporate/freelance writing, where my brain needs to be more alert and focused rather than completely lost in its own world.

EATING

Bruschetta - one of my most favourite things to make and eat this time of year, when tomatoes are at their fragrant, juicy best. And the smell of fresh basil just makes me swoon. You seriously couldn’t get a more delicious, satisfying meal from such a small number of ingredients. If you have grown tomatoes yourself and they’re ready to pick, eat them like this. Mine were still warm from the sun.

A summer tomato and green bean curry (pictured) - all homegrown produce, braised in mild spices, tamarind, coconut milk and curry leaves. Absolutely delicious, though when I make it again I will add potatoes to make it slightly more substantial as it was a little liquid from all the tomato juices (though the broth was beautiful). Let me know if you want me to write up the recipe.

Tofu fried rice (several times!)

Vegan banana bread

I also cleaned out the freezer and made breadcrumbs from all the end pieces I had stored in there, and now have a giant jar of crunchy crumbs ready for an autumn of gratins and pasta bakes.

DRINKING

I’m a bit of a fan of the Twinings Infuse bags for cold water (though, they come in plastic, SIGH) and this week I tried the blueberry, apple and blackcurrant flavour, which I think might be my new favourite. Fruity but not sweet, just how I like it!

I’ve also rediscovered T2 Tea’s New York Breakfast - with soy milk, honey and a pinch of salt. Divine.

PICKING

So many tomatoes. Zucchini verging on marrowhood. Green and yellow beans, cooked to a melting softness in the aforementioned curry. Celery, getting thicker and prouder by the day. Figs, though the netting has obscured their ripeness from me and therefore there were many past their prime rotting in the bottom of the pot, but a feast for the ants. Strawberries are still cropping nicely, and swiping one as I water the garden in the morning or evening is a delightful treat - these are without a doubt the best, sweetest strawberries I’ve ever eaten in my life.

My parents also brought round more tomatoes, zucchini and apples. I’m going to make Pip Lincolne’s spaghetti with roasted tomatoes tonight, and zucchini relish and stewed apples over the weekend.

WATCHING

Call My Agent! (Dix pour cent)(Netflix) - I think I am more obsessed with this show than I was with Pam and Tommy. Such a finely written and acted comedy about the French film world, and more specifically a Parisian talent agency and all the hijinks the agents and clients get up to. We’ve laughed so hard watching it. It’s lovely to see Paris again too - the Paris I remember. It’s seriously brilliant and I highly recommend it!

WEARING/APPLYING

Country Road sweatshirts - I have two (navy and citrus) and live in them. They’re perfect for this in-between time of year where it’s 28 degrees one day and 15 the next!

THINKING ABOUT

A book I saw in a country charity shop two years ago, in the Before times, only just. I really wish I’d bought it and I wonder if it’s still there. I might take a road trip next week and find out…though, with the price of petrol at the moment, perhaps not.

FAVOURITE EXPERIENCE/S OF THE WEEK

A 9km bushwalk with my friend and her dog…and getting an ice cream afterwards!

I also loved having my mum over for coffee and aforementioned vegan banana bread. I know I’ve been back for three years now, but the idea that my mum, who I often went years without seeing, can now just pop round to my place for a coffee is still a novel one, and utterly delightful.

this week

Figs on my tree. I think this time next week they will all be ready to eat.

Grateful for

Health. Safety. Love. Enough to eat, clean water.

More granularly, I was grateful for the kind words and encouragement from my friend and fellow creative writing PhD candidate who just gets it, as it’s been a bit of hard slog this week. Also deeply grateful for this Charlotte Wood interview where there were two very comforting things said that I really needed to hear:

“It’s taken me a very long time to trust that the book will show me how to write it if I just pay attention. If I don’t freak out too much, if I don’t resist what’s happening as I write…but it’s hard to trust that, because a lot of the time you’re throwing stuff away because it’s wrong! With the first draft, the only thing I can do is go with it.”

“I’m always telling younger writers to normalise rejection. It’s not something that you can avoid and it’s not something you should attach too much meaning to. Your work will find its way if you pay attention to the work. The best way for me to deal with rejection is to go back to my work. When I’m really dug in to a work, all of that anxiety about the outside world and what people think of you just drops away. Which is kind of why I write, I think.”

In awe of

Those in the medical profession. How they stay so calm, professional and caring through it all.

Reading

Frankie Magazine: Where to recycle your clothes and shoes in Australia

The Saturday Paper: Bruce Pascoe on why we should bring back Aboriginal food industries

The Audacity: The Ladies Room by Nancy Powaga - “Listen, you can’t tell a person’s gender based on how they look, and you shouldn’t assume or tell someone they’re in the wrong bathroom.” A very moving and powerful piece. I particularly appreciated Nancy’s point about how all forms of oppression are connected.

The Planthunter: A Message From The Flood Zone - “I have read many peer reviewed scientific papers about the link between a warming climate and extreme weather events like flooding and bushfires. I knew, intellectually, that events of this nature would happen in my lifetime. But knowing something intellectually is very different to living it.“

The Conversation: The new IPCC report’s grim predictions, and why adaptation efforts are falling behind. This is rather terrifying reading.

My Body by Emily Ratajkowski. The perfect read to follow bingeing the Pam and Tommy series.

Listening to

Black Magic Woman: Interview with Reconciliation Australia’s CEO, Karen Mundine

ABC Conversations: Dr Anne Aly’s passion for justice

Life Examined: Alain de Botton and the complexity of modern day love

Eating

One-pan orecchiette puttanesca from Ottolenghi’s Flavour (pictured)

Crowd-pleasing Tex Mex casserole (perfect vehicle for leftover cooked rice, FYI)

Tinned tomato risotto - but this time with fresh tomatoes from the garden, and I veganised it.

I also turned some of the huge pile of cucumbers my neighbour gave me into a pickle, which we’ve eaten with tofu and rice so far. Homegrown cucumbers are indeed a revelation.

Drinking

This jalapeño and lime soda is nose-pricklingly tangy and really good! Perfect with Friday night nachos, which seem to have become a thing.

Picking

Silverbeet, chard, spinach, strawberries, tomatoes and… celery! A friend gave me a celery plant during the national lockdown of 2020, which I kept in a pot until a few months ago, when it became increasingly clear it was confined and starting to suffer. I planted it in the ground and it has thrived. Instead of being more like a herb that I’d use as a parsley substitute, it has become quite substantial. Hence I am now harvesting pencil-thick stalks of celery.

Watching

TV-wise, not much! The last episode of Pam and Tommy (Disney+) which I am still reeling from and a bit of chain-watching The Simpsons (also Disney+) because we haven’t watched it for 10 years and suddenly have hundreds of episodes we’ve never seen, which is a huge novelty. I’ve also caught up with my YouTube favourites in my lunch breaks…but that’s about it.

Wearing/applying

Despite Tasmania lifting the mask mandate for indoor retail spaces, I am still wearing one everywhere.

My Bell Jar t-shirt and favourite old Jack Wills hoodie.

Yoga leggings and smart jumpers for WFH (I know - JUMPERS, when it was 27 degrees last week) and posh jeans and dresses for the office. Which nobody sees unless I’m walking to the kitchen or the library, as I’m all alone in my office. Which is not a bad thing when you’re trying to write a book, but I do miss seeing people. As masks are mandated in any shared indoor spaces at uni, which I fully support, either everyone is WFH or coordinating it so we’re not in the office at the same time. It’s just what we have to do right now but it is a bit lonely.

My Vitamin C serum has run out but to be honest I wasn’t wild about it so I’m on the hunt for another…

Thinking about

Things I’m looking forward to. It’s the only way to stave off the despair and overwhelm - but, as Sarah Wilson put it in her excellent newsletter, maybe we should be overwhelmed. We should surrender to it, because then we will stop being so tolerant of the intolerable. Maybe then things will change.

Favourite experience/s of the week

Coffee with my PhD friend. Starting a new embroidery. Listening to compositions for the violin from 1815 by an early Tasmanian composer in an empty room in the library, marvelling at the two centuries that have passed, at how humanity has been here before and it will be again.

this week

A high angle shot of a woman's hand holding a donut. Her brightly patterned jumpsuit is in the background.

A sourdough donut eaten the sun in a quiet, leafy corner of a city park is a pleasure I don’t indulge in enough.

On a current hiatus from social media, I’m finding myself wanting to blog more. So I thought I’d try something different here and do a little newsletter-like update of things I’ve done and thought about during the week.

So without further ado, this week I’ve been:

Grateful for

My health and my safety. To live somewhere untouched by severe floods and war. Moving back home has not been without its challenges, but there hasn’t been a single day that I’ve not been unbelievably grateful to be here. I don’t feel I have anything of value to add to the horrific, terrifying events currently unfolding both in Australia and overseas. But there are many ways we can help.

In awe of

Olia Hercules, Alissa Timoshkina and all the food writers in the UK who have banded together for #CookForUkraine. I have Hercules’ first book Mamushka on order.

The community in Mullumbimby who are coordinating an incredible local rescue operation in their flood-ravaged region, where landslides and broken roads have left countless people stranded. This was sobering reading.

Reading

An old favourite, What Helps by Satya Robyn, a book I often turn to when things feel overwhelming.

I discovered the American poet Jane Hirshfield in January and have just finished her 2020 collection Ledger. How her poems manage to be so confronting as well as consoling I do not know, but I loved every minute I spent with them.

Devotion by Hannah Kent, a writer of beauty and integrity who never disappoints me, whose lyrical power keeps growing and growing, and whom I’ve been fortunate enough to interview!

A pile of Flow magazines I “borrowed” from my sister.

Listening to

My inner autumn and inner winter playlists on TIDAL.

James and Ashley Stay At Home: How to remake the world with Sarah Senteilles, author of Stranger Care

Writes4Women: Heart of Writing, Nikki Gemmell on her new memoir, Dissolve

The Diary of a CEO: Fearne Cotton, THIS is how to build confidence and set yourself free

Wild with Sarah Wilson: All the Ask Me Anything episodes

Ludovico Einaudi, Max Richter, Nils Frahm, Sophie Hutchings - all their albums, on repeat, always. Perfect writing music.

Eating

The Nacho Average Nachos from Charity Morgan’s amazing book Unbelievably Vegan - this is the fourth time I’ve made them in two weeks. It’s our new favourite summer meal! Lots of prep, admittedly, but you get enough of the fixins to get about 8 servings out of them. The queso is quite out of this world. Everything I’ve cooked from Charity’s book has been delicious but this dish has been the stand-out so far.

I made Tasmanian culinary icon Sally Wise’s vegan coconut blackcurrant ice cream which turned out beautifully. I was delighted my basic ice cream maker I bought in 2013 still works! I will experiment with a salted caramel flavoured one next.

There’s also been our standard pizzas on the barbecue (I will write you the recipe at some point as they deserve a post of their own), this new favourite zucchini pasta, and as I’ve had a few nights working late, curry from the freezer!

Picking

I grew these!

Strawberries, chard, kale, spinach, a few figs, a handful of tomatoes. I also finally successfully grew my own garlic! The green beans are back with a vengeance so I’ll look forward to picking those next week. The potatoes are also starting to look ready to dig up, but they might be a few weeks more yet.

Watching

Pam and Tommy (Disney+) - I really didn’t think this would be for me, but I am OBSESSED. Also adoring all the 90s music.

The Electrical Life of Louis Wain (Amazon Prime) - not only starring Benedict Cumberbatch and Claire Foy, but Taika Waititi and Nick Cave as well, so what’s not to like? A biopic about a little-known (to me at least) eccentric inventor and artist in Victorian London that is hilarious, sad and utterly charming. A refreshingly diverse cast too. We loved it!

Wearing/applying

This jumpsuit from local Tassie designer Keshet which has elicited many comments from friends and strangers alike. You can see it in the first photo with the donut too!

This is my SPF - I wear it every day, in every season.

This is the perfume I wore this week that got the most “you smell great” remarks.

Thinking about

Covid. Floods. Incompetent public officials. Ukraine. Peace. War. Mental health. Climate change. Insecure housing. All the biggies.

Favourite experience/s of the week

Spending time with my sisters - I had dinner with one and her family on Saturday and got a pedicure with another on Sunday, such little things I couldn’t do for many years - and going for a run on Tuesday morning after we’d had heavy rain the night before, inhaling the incredible scent of dripping eucalypts. I also got a Wordle in two guesses (that’s only happened twice).

Same time next week? Wherever you are, I hope you’re well and finding things to savour. Thanks for being here xx

quitting social media: an experiment

At the start of January 2022, I decided to have a somewhat permanent break from social media.

I didn't announce it nor did I particularly plan it ahead of time - it was a combination of the lingering effects of some stressful events at the end of 2021 to top off what had not been a vintage year anyway; and despair at what felt like a maelstrom of anger and fear everywhere I looked online around the time of the omicron surge in Australia. For my mental health, I knew something needed to change.

I was also increasingly dissatisfied with how many hours I knew I was losing to basically what is the psyche's equivalent of the pokies.

Don’t get me wrong, I think there are some great aspects to social media. It’s not a bad thing in itself. But what many of us don’t appreciate is that the companies who own the platforms (Facebook/Meta/Zuckerverse, etc) designed them deliberately to be as addictive as possible. Therefore, trying to get some semblance of balance in your usage of social media is so much harder than you’d think.

So, I disappeared. Cold turkey.

Has anyone noticed? I have no idea! But what I have noticed is an incredible difference in my mental health, my stress levels, my equilibrium, my energy, and my creativity. It might be a combination of other changes I’ve made (more about those later) but I can’t recall ever feeling this clear-headed in my entire adult life.

Connection with others is what fuels me. And I value the connections I’ve made on social media over the years very much. But many of them have been taken offline - I now have two penpals who live in Melbourne, both of whom I follow on socials, but during the lockdowns we started writing letters to each other, which we’ve continued. As a result I know far more about what is really going on in their lives than what they choose to share publicly on their grids - and likewise they know far more about what’s really going on with me. That is real connection. That is what I want more of.

The video below (please forgive the portrait mode it was shot in, I know it should be landscape!) is a little stream-of-consciousness ramble I recorded three weeks into my break. Another month has passed since I recorded this and I still feel no real need to return. I am missing the connection and interaction with others but I know with a bit of effort this can be sourced elsewhere. And I think more and more people are catching on. Perhaps blogging is about to have a big renaissance.

Stay tuned. This is an interesting, and exciting, experiment. 

  • Hello everyone! It’s the thirty-first of January, which means I have been off social media for three weeks today. And, as I've alluded to in previous videos, I've been so surprised by the fact that I haven't missed it at all.

    I feel calmer, I feel less panicked, I feel less anxiety, I don't feel as angry or tense or on edge. I don't feel like my attention or focus is compromised. I feel clearer in the head and more alert. I've been able to choose where my energy goes and that's incredibly empowering.

    I really thought that I had a handle on my social media habits. I really thought that I chose when I looked at these various platforms, that I chose the time of day or the period of time that I allowed myself to have a look but I really didn't appreciate how many hours each day I was clocking up, refreshing and losing time when there wasn't really anything new to see and, more to the point, there wasn't anything new for me to say or share! It was just very basic stuff that I'm not sure people are really all that interested in and it's not content I want to devote my precious time and creativity to. I want to use my creativity for my creative work and so to have this time back, this brain space back, feels like such a gift.

    And it was a gift I was able to give myself with basically no effort. All I had to do was make the decision. It's amazing what a transformation it has been.

    I didn't realise that the average social media user spends 2.5 hours a day on the various platforms – that’s 15-18 hours a week? That's a part time job! So when you think about it that way, that’s 15-18 hours a week that you could get a part time job, that you could use to learn an instrument, to train for a 10K, to write a novel, to build websites, to exercise, to start a garden, to spend time with your family - all of these things that we think we don't have the time to do, we actually do but it's making a choice to use your time consciously and to make conscious choices. That’s something that I have advocated publicly for a very long time, but it was always within the health and fitness context. I’m slowly appreciating that making conscious choices is something that effects every aspect of our lives - physical health, mental health, wellbeing, financial freedom, financial health, career, everything! We have far more choices than we think we do. We have more power than we think we do.

    I guess as I've gotten older, my life is just more and more about wanting to live in integrity and really wanting to live my values. Having had this little time out to figure out what those values are and articulate them for myself and know deep within what I want to stand for and how I want to spend my time and the difference I want to make…if everyone could have this kind of epiphany, I wonder what kind of world we’d live in.

    I'll leave it there for now. I don't know when I'm going to go back on these things. I don't know if I'll go back at all! We shall see. Thank you for listening.

Would you like to share your thoughts on this post with me? Please do - I’d love to hear from you!

life lessons

Today I found a poem (well, I called it a poem - collection of thoughts might be more accurate!) I wrote when I was 27. I’m now 40, and I think the advice it contains has stood the test of time.

Me in Hyde Park, age 27. Photo taken by Tom, my then boyfriend, now husband of 11 years.

Me in Hyde Park, age 27. Photo taken by Tom, my then boyfriend, now husband of 11 years.


If it sounds too good to be true
it probably is.
Pick your friends wisely.
Never take happiness for granted.
Try to finish what you start.
Don't sneeze too loudly
in public.
Wear lipstick on Sundays.
Remember you don't have to fake it
when you're with the right person.
There is nothing that can stop you,
short of death.
Recycle.
Smell strawberries,
roses and clean hair
with equal delight.
Drink water.
Have more books than clothes.
Always offer.
Buy a good coat.
Say please.
Don't rent a flat when you can see
rat bait in the kitchen.
A good bolognaise needs red wine.
As does cheese.
Take a day off. Don't be afraid to ask
for what you want.
But don't do it just because you can.
Write only, and flamboyantly,
with a fountain pen.
Wear sunscreen.
Say thank you.
Smile at people on public transport.
You'll either brighten their day,
or confuse them.
Find some stars for your sky.